I (F19) feel like I'm not sure if my girlfriend (F18) is even into me because she's obsessed with male celebrities and fictional charcters and never has given any indication to liking girls

Ok, so my girlfriend and I used to be best friends going for about 4 years. I asked her out about 4 times during those four years. We've tried to separate (as friends) but we just kept coming back to eachother. I only kept asking her out because I felt like she was super into me- especially when she told me straight up that she wouldnt mind if I had sex with her with a strap-on. But she never really wanted a relationship with me. I was struggling with depression and insecurities, so I definitely am a part of the cause of how diffuctional our friendship was. I thought she was into me, I asked her out, she regected me, I fell apart, she got a bit angry, and I left to find myself. This happened about 4 times in the same exact way. This last time, however, I put so much space between us (because I almost failed high school and with living on my own, I needed to get over her). We talked occasionally, but I stopped for the most part. Cue her messaging me randomly one day declaring her love for me. How before she was just trying to find herself and wasn't looking for any sort of relationship. How when we first met she had a huge crush on me but I was straight back then (she made me bi btw). How she realized the feelings she had for me were love when I mentioned a really good friend of mine and she got jealous. How she tried to find someone else but no one was like me. How I understood her like no one else and she liked me more than anyone in her life.

Now, before this, I knew she was bi. But the thing is, she obsesses over male celebrities and fictional characters. Like, she can bring herself to tears everytime she thinks of one. My girls been through a lot, with ptsd and pots with depression and anxiety. So, I think, these guys are her coping mechanisms. But she never, ever obsesses over girls. Ever. I've never even heard her say she liked one- fictional or real life. To top that off, she says she can't quite envision herself going down on a girl or that she's interested- but she's talked about wanting to go down on her fictional guys.

I'm not sure of this is important- but her family are christians. They, for the most part, dont want their daughter being gay. Her dad wouldnt mind it, but I'm sure it would break her moms heart. She can be easily swayed by her parents.

Now cut to the present, she seems eager to tell her parents. Scared but eager. But she still obsesses over fictional characters. Actually, the foundation of our friendship was built on us talking about her love of these guys. I'm just wondering, am I just a stepping stone to the guy she actually wants or am I overthinking? What if her love for me only stems from me taking care of her (daddy/little girl style lol). She never seems attracted to me physically- just only what I do and can potentially do to or for her. I asked if she was attracted to me recently and she said of course she was. Saying, "Of course you are attractive (me). I cant really pick out my favorite feature but I enjoy your eyes and facial structure and cheeks I hope that doesn't seem weird lol" and that I looked like a roman statue with good hair. I'm not insecure as much anymore as I started working out and a lot of guys asked me out this year so it's not my anxiety questioning her.

I just- ugh, my brain is so scrambled, I hope you make something out of this mess

Tl;dr- my GF is obsessed with male characters and celebrities only and I'm questioning if she truly does like me or she just doesnt want to loose me again

Submitted July 01, 2019 at 12:21AM

Ok, so my girlfriend and I used to be best friends going for about 4 years. I asked her out about 4 times during those four years. We've tried to separate (as friends) but we just kept coming back to eachother. I only kept asking her out because I felt like she was super into me- especially when she told me straight up that she wouldnt mind if I had sex with her with a strap-on. But she never really wanted a relationship with me. I was struggling with depression and insecurities, so I definitely am a part of the cause of how diffuctional our friendship was. I thought she was into me, I asked her out, she regected me, I fell apart, she got a bit angry, and I left to find myself. This happened about 4 times in the same exact way. This last time, however, I put so much space between us (because I almost failed high school and with living on my own, I needed to get over her). We talked occasionally, but I stopped for the most part. Cue her messaging me randomly one day declaring her love for me. How before she was just trying to find herself and wasn't looking for any sort of relationship. How when we first met she had a huge crush on me but I was straight back then (she made me bi btw). How she realized the feelings she had for me were love when I mentioned a really good friend of mine and she got jealous. How she tried to find someone else but no one was like me. How I understood her like no one else and she liked me more than anyone in her life.Now, before this, I knew she was bi. But the thing is, she obsesses over male celebrities and fictional characters. Like, she can bring herself to tears everytime she thinks of one. My girls been through a lot, with ptsd and pots with depression and anxiety. So, I think, these guys are her coping mechanisms. But she never, ever obsesses over girls. Ever. I've never even heard her say she liked one- fictional or real life. To top that off, she says she can't quite envision herself going down on a girl or that she's interested- but she's talked about wanting to go down on her fictional guys.I'm not sure of this is important- but her family are christians. They, for the most part, dont want their daughter being gay. Her dad wouldnt mind it, but I'm sure it would break her moms heart. She can be easily swayed by her parents.Now cut to the present, she seems eager to tell her parents. Scared but eager. But she still obsesses over fictional characters. Actually, the foundation of our friendship was built on us talking about her love of these guys. I'm just wondering, am I just a stepping stone to the guy she actually wants or am I overthinking? What if her love for me only stems from me taking care of her (daddy/little girl style lol). She never seems attracted to me physically- just only what I do and can potentially do to or for her. I asked if she was attracted to me recently and she said of course she was. Saying, "Of course you are attractive (me). I cant really pick out my favorite feature but I enjoy your eyes and facial structure and cheeks I hope that doesn't seem weird lol" and that I looked like a roman statue with good hair. I'm not insecure as much anymore as I started working out and a lot of guys asked me out this year so it's not my anxiety questioning her.I just- ugh, my brain is so scrambled, I hope you make something out of this messTl;dr- my GF is obsessed with male characters and celebrities only and I'm questioning if she truly does like me or she just doesnt want to loose me again