F/ 35 —Dating during divorce/living w parents/body image?

Hey all,

So I have been abstinent 2 years; I left my abusive marriage back at the beginning of this year (almost a year separated now). I found a lawyer back in March and filed papers in August but have not had court yet. Anyway, I’m in debt & I’m staying at my parents. I have a part time job and 2 kids under age 10. I have spent a lot of time beginning over a year ago to really cultivate and build up my own self again; time with friends and family etc. But I’m getting the urge to meet someone. Someone to go to the movies with, go to events etc. NOT looking for one night stands or a guy to support me/meet my kids or fall in love anytime soon. The problem is I have not dated in more than a decade. I’m trying an app but finding it weird. I spoke w a guy or two who would like to meet in person. I’m very self conscious about my post baby vagina, especially with men who see how young I look and then see I have an episiotomy scar/wrinkly vagina. If I had no debt from the divorce, I would just go get some work done (on the outside) to tidy the appearance to feel better about myself. I realize some people’s attitudes may be that, I shouldn’t date if I’m at this place in life to begin with, but again it’s been a really long time and besides friends, I am somewhat lonely.



Submitted December 17, 2019 at 11:51PM

Hey all,So I have been abstinent 2 years; I left my abusive marriage back at the beginning of this year (almost a year separated now). I found a lawyer back in March and filed papers in August but have not had court yet. Anyway, I’m in debt & I’m staying at my parents. I have a part time job and 2 kids under age 10. I have spent a lot of time beginning over a year ago to really cultivate and build up my own self again; time with friends and family etc. But I’m getting the urge to meet someone. Someone to go to the movies with, go to events etc. NOT looking for one night stands or a guy to support me/meet my kids or fall in love anytime soon. The problem is I have not dated in more than a decade. I’m trying an app but finding it weird. I spoke w a guy or two who would like to meet in person. I’m very self conscious about my post baby vagina, especially with men who see how young I look and then see I have an episiotomy scar/wrinkly vagina. If I had no debt from the divorce, I would just go get some work done (on the outside) to tidy the appearance to feel better about myself. I realize some people’s attitudes may be that, I shouldn’t date if I’m at this place in life to begin with, but again it’s been a really long time and besides friends, I am somewhat lonely.
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