Should I (19M) enter a relationship with someone (19F) who's going to be gone for an extended period of time in the near future?

Hey y'all- figured I should get some alternate perspectives.

I met a girl at college a year ago, and she's basically perfect- if I made a list of everything I'm looking for in a partner, she would hit almost every bullet point. We hooked up a few times at the end of last year/over the summer, but now she's telling me that she wants something deeper than that. Normally I would've been ecstatic, but I've got one hangup: this July, she'll be leaving for a 6 month study abroad trip; I won't get to see her again until December. I know that's almost a year away, and I don't want to stop her from doing something she's always wanted to do, but I still worry. I hear all sorts of horror stories about the strain long distance puts on a relationship, and I definitely want to keep her my life in some capacity; I don't want a failed romance to ruin that.

I explained to her how I felt; she said my concerns were reasonable, and that she also worried sometimes about me getting lonely and finding a replacement for her during her time abroad. However, she told me she was committed to making this work if I was (and for what it's worth, I believe her, but I know feelings can change).

Should I commit to a relationship with this girl? Or are those 6 months too much of a barrier?

TL;DR: Concerned about starting a relationship that I know is going to become long distance in the near future.



Submitted October 06, 2019 at 12:17AM

Hey y'all- figured I should get some alternate perspectives.I met a girl at college a year ago, and she's basically perfect- if I made a list of everything I'm looking for in a partner, she would hit almost every bullet point. We hooked up a few times at the end of last year/over the summer, but now she's telling me that she wants something deeper than that. Normally I would've been ecstatic, but I've got one hangup: this July, she'll be leaving for a 6 month study abroad trip; I won't get to see her again until December. I know that's almost a year away, and I don't want to stop her from doing something she's always wanted to do, but I still worry. I hear all sorts of horror stories about the strain long distance puts on a relationship, and I definitely want to keep her my life in some capacity; I don't want a failed romance to ruin that.I explained to her how I felt; she said my concerns were reasonable, and that she also worried sometimes about me getting lonely and finding a replacement for her during her time abroad. However, she told me she was committed to making this work if I was (and for what it's worth, I believe her, but I know feelings can change).Should I commit to a relationship with this girl? Or are those 6 months too much of a barrier?TL;DR: Concerned about starting a relationship that I know is going to become long distance in the near future.
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