How can I (31F) be respectful of the guy I’m dating (30M) disability?

I’ve known this man for about 10 years. When I first met him, he did not have a disability. We flirted for about 2 years but I transferred to another college and we just decided to we would still be friends but not anything more than that. We never were anything official.

About a year ago he was in a car accident. Because of that he lost all mobility in one of his arms. We reconnected through Facebook and he was telling me about his situations. I didn’t realize how bad his injury was until we met up in person and I realized that he cannot move his arm at all.

It was a shock to see him now because he used to be a gym rat and now he isn’t able to workout like he used to so he is a lot smaller. I still have feelings for him and we are thinking about picking back up where we left off all those years ago but I’m very concerned about being respectful of him with his situation about his arm and also how to even talk to him about it. I have yet to mention anything about it because I don’t want to offend him and also I don’t know how to talk about being intimate either.

Tl/dr: he was in an accident and can’t use his arm and I don’t want to offend him by asking him about it.



Submitted September 10, 2019 at 11:44PM

I’ve known this man for about 10 years. When I first met him, he did not have a disability. We flirted for about 2 years but I transferred to another college and we just decided to we would still be friends but not anything more than that. We never were anything official.About a year ago he was in a car accident. Because of that he lost all mobility in one of his arms. We reconnected through Facebook and he was telling me about his situations. I didn’t realize how bad his injury was until we met up in person and I realized that he cannot move his arm at all.It was a shock to see him now because he used to be a gym rat and now he isn’t able to workout like he used to so he is a lot smaller. I still have feelings for him and we are thinking about picking back up where we left off all those years ago but I’m very concerned about being respectful of him with his situation about his arm and also how to even talk to him about it. I have yet to mention anything about it because I don’t want to offend him and also I don’t know how to talk about being intimate either.Tl/dr: he was in an accident and can’t use his arm and I don’t want to offend him by asking him about it.

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