Would I be an asshole if I ask a girl out when she already has a boyfriend? [24m, 24f]

I was gonna post this in r/AITA but I see they have a 'no relationship' related post so I was hoping I would be accepted here. I don't wanna write the whole thing again so I will kind of post it in the same format.

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TL;DR Let me make the scene as simple as possible: Girl (my coworker, actually) already has boyfriend for 6 year. I like this girl. We're on friendly terms. I want to ask her to be my girlfriend. She not broken up with the previous boyfriend. Big dilemma.

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When we first went to grab lunch together during our lunch break we had a nice chance to have an uninterrupted introductory talk. We got around to talking about our relationships. She said she has a boyfriend from high school. She's never really been out of a relationship. The current one lasted 6 years. He asked her out and she's stuck around since, but according to her she tells him every now and then that she wants to break up. I told her personality-wise I was the opposite. Never been in a relationship. I told her I'm not the kind of person who feels I need a girlfriend, and I'm rather content being alone. That was then.

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Fast forward several months to now and things are different. I want to be with this girl. We are on friendly terms. She makes time out of her busy schedule to hang out with me on the weekends, and on the weekdays we'll talk and have lunch together sometimes. I dunno. I told her I didn't want a girlfriend but I've never really experienced this. She's so smart, she is direct. Patient. She says what she wants but is tactful, she reprimands but is gentle. She is staunchly independent but caring. She is all too easy on the eyes. She is someone I want to add to my life.

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I'm sure she's not going to make a move because of what I said when we met, so I have to if I wanna make something happen... but SHE ALREADY HAS A BOYFRIEND. I don't even know this dude. We haven't met. He doesn't know I exist, really. Something tells me I can go ahead and ask her because she's told me that she's told her boyfriend that she wants to break up just about every year (just that it doesn't really happen... I guess for comfort?) Anyway... I realize I'm acting like a homewrecker, or at least a cheater. If it works out then I've just snatched his girl right from under his nose! How terrible to think about. I sure wouldn't want something like that happen to me unwittingly. I thought about it lots and I think from my perspective, if she did she same thing to me with another guy I would be disappointed that she didn't tell me about it but I would be accepting because it is no better than what I am about to do. But I am not asking about my feelings, or hers. Am I being an asshole to that man? Is this fair?

Submitted July 12, 2019 at 10:06PM

I was gonna post this in r/AITA but I see they have a 'no relationship' related post so I was hoping I would be accepted here. I don't wanna write the whole thing again so I will kind of post it in the same format.​TL;DR Let me make the scene as simple as possible: Girl (my coworker, actually) already has boyfriend for 6 year. I like this girl. We're on friendly terms. I want to ask her to be my girlfriend. She not broken up with the previous boyfriend. Big dilemma.​When we first went to grab lunch together during our lunch break we had a nice chance to have an uninterrupted introductory talk. We got around to talking about our relationships. She said she has a boyfriend from high school. She's never really been out of a relationship. The current one lasted 6 years. He asked her out and she's stuck around since, but according to her she tells him every now and then that she wants to break up. I told her personality-wise I was the opposite. Never been in a relationship. I told her I'm not the kind of person who feels I need a girlfriend, and I'm rather content being alone. That was then.​Fast forward several months to now and things are different. I want to be with this girl. We are on friendly terms. She makes time out of her busy schedule to hang out with me on the weekends, and on the weekdays we'll talk and have lunch together sometimes. I dunno. I told her I didn't want a girlfriend but I've never really experienced this. She's so smart, she is direct. Patient. She says what she wants but is tactful, she reprimands but is gentle. She is staunchly independent but caring. She is all too easy on the eyes. She is someone I want to add to my life.​I'm sure she's not going to make a move because of what I said when we met, so I have to if I wanna make something happen... but SHE ALREADY HAS A BOYFRIEND. I don't even know this dude. We haven't met. He doesn't know I exist, really. Something tells me I can go ahead and ask her because she's told me that she's told her boyfriend that she wants to break up just about every year (just that it doesn't really happen... I guess for comfort?) Anyway... I realize I'm acting like a homewrecker, or at least a cheater. If it works out then I've just snatched his girl right from under his nose! How terrible to think about. I sure wouldn't want something like that happen to me unwittingly. I thought about it lots and I think from my perspective, if she did she same thing to me with another guy I would be disappointed that she didn't tell me about it but I would be accepting because it is no better than what I am about to do. But I am not asking about my feelings, or hers. Am I being an asshole to that man? Is this fair?