How can I (20F) cope with feelings that my boyfriend (21M) doesn’t care about the relationship?

My boyfriend and I started dating around 5 months ago. We started off as really great friends and came to understand each other well. We are compatible, and can speak about almost anything. It’s always fun and all to talk with him.

However, when it comes to speaking about emotions, difficulty arises. He tells me he loves me and that it’s difficult for him to show that he cares. There was a time when I told him it felt like he didn’t care about our relationship at all, that I looked past it because I knew it was. I cried in front of him, and hated that I had to do so.

His lack of affection is slowly affecting me. I thought I could let it be because I knew about his past. I don’t want to force him to do anything as well. I am finding myself hesitant to reply and putting off his messages. I don’t like the fact that I am doing this but I am wondering what’s the point if he doesn’t put in the same effort as I am doing?

TLDR; I have trouble coping with my boyfriend’s inability to express affection.



Submitted June 26, 2019 at 12:15AM

My boyfriend and I started dating around 5 months ago. We started off as really great friends and came to understand each other well. We are compatible, and can speak about almost anything. It’s always fun and all to talk with him.However, when it comes to speaking about emotions, difficulty arises. He tells me he loves me and that it’s difficult for him to show that he cares. There was a time when I told him it felt like he didn’t care about our relationship at all, that I looked past it because I knew it was. I cried in front of him, and hated that I had to do so.His lack of affection is slowly affecting me. I thought I could let it be because I knew about his past. I don’t want to force him to do anything as well. I am finding myself hesitant to reply and putting off his messages. I don’t like the fact that I am doing this but I am wondering what’s the point if he doesn’t put in the same effort as I am doing?TLDR; I have trouble coping with my boyfriend’s inability to express affection.
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