[27F] My SO is obsessed with our hobby

When we first met, I knew he'd be the father of my children. We have a lot in common. We love to travel, explore, curious about life, and more importantly... We both love climbing. We recently got engaged and I really thought things couldn't be more perfect.

As time went on, it seems like his passion for climbing quickly turned into addiction. Once the honeymoon phase fizzled out, I felt like I got pushed to second place, with his love for climbing in first.

He works a M-F job, and comes home only to sleep, eat, shower, with the other hours consumed by his addiciton. He's only happy when he climbs. He hardly has energy for our relationship, or trying something new together.

I love the fact that we can both share a hobby, but it's hard to convince him to do anything else because it'll get in the way of his climbing. Trips are strictly for climbing... And he jokes "maybe we can do something non climbing related"

TL;DR I like climbing, but he's obsessed with it. It consumes him and he doesn't want to do anything else. All his good energy is spent climbing and he puts minimum effort into "us" time. We hardly do anything else anymore. And if we do, I have to ask, and feel guilty about it. And if I don't go climbing with him, I'll never see him. I feel like it's the only thing that makes him happy.

Has anyone else ever been with someone that is obsessed with their hobby? How did you deal with it? Is it normal to only do one thing in a relationship?



Submitted June 25, 2019 at 11:22PM

When we first met, I knew he'd be the father of my children. We have a lot in common. We love to travel, explore, curious about life, and more importantly... We both love climbing. We recently got engaged and I really thought things couldn't be more perfect.As time went on, it seems like his passion for climbing quickly turned into addiction. Once the honeymoon phase fizzled out, I felt like I got pushed to second place, with his love for climbing in first.He works a M-F job, and comes home only to sleep, eat, shower, with the other hours consumed by his addiciton. He's only happy when he climbs. He hardly has energy for our relationship, or trying something new together.I love the fact that we can both share a hobby, but it's hard to convince him to do anything else because it'll get in the way of his climbing. Trips are strictly for climbing... And he jokes "maybe we can do something non climbing related"TL;DR I like climbing, but he's obsessed with it. It consumes him and he doesn't want to do anything else. All his good energy is spent climbing and he puts minimum effort into "us" time. We hardly do anything else anymore. And if we do, I have to ask, and feel guilty about it. And if I don't go climbing with him, I'll never see him. I feel like it's the only thing that makes him happy.Has anyone else ever been with someone that is obsessed with their hobby? How did you deal with it? Is it normal to only do one thing in a relationship?
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