Redditors who married into a different culture or had bizarre fears before marriage

Ok, here goes... this thought has never crossed my mind until my fiancé proposed. I am struggling with the fact that my children will not be 100% Italian. My father is an Italian immigrant and my mother’s parents immigrated here from Italy. I used to travel to Italy every other summer and lived there for about 3 months out of the year to visit my dad’s family. My fiancé is Spanish, he is first generation American. I am concerned with how this will affect my children. His family is from a third world country where I wouldn’t feel comfortable taking my children not is it a place you would go visit. There culture is also a little different than mine in the way the children are supposed to support or help their parents and grandparents. In Italy, it’s quite the opposite and I want my children to grow up with the ideals I grew up with. I feel like I am losing a sense of my identity by not marrying someone Italian. I realize this sounds crazy and bizarre. This thought never crossed my mind until now. He is my soulmate and I literally could not see my life without him so it sucks to feel like this. Has anyone else had unrealistic fears such as this prior to marriage?

Submitted September 04, 2020 at 11:47PM

Ok, here goes... this thought has never crossed my mind until my fiancé proposed. I am struggling with the fact that my children will not be 100% Italian. My father is an Italian immigrant and my mother’s parents immigrated here from Italy. I used to travel to Italy every other summer and lived there for about 3 months out of the year to visit my dad’s family. My fiancé is Spanish, he is first generation American. I am concerned with how this will affect my children. His family is from a third world country where I wouldn’t feel comfortable taking my children not is it a place you would go visit. There culture is also a little different than mine in the way the children are supposed to support or help their parents and grandparents. In Italy, it’s quite the opposite and I want my children to grow up with the ideals I grew up with. I feel like I am losing a sense of my identity by not marrying someone Italian. I realize this sounds crazy and bizarre. This thought never crossed my mind until now. He is my soulmate and I literally could not see my life without him so it sucks to feel like this. Has anyone else had unrealistic fears such as this prior to marriage?