My [24M] GF [24F] will fight with me regardless of whether I am busy or stressed- is this normal

Tl;DR: When my GF is upset, she will send a barrage of angry messages regardless of whether i am available to talk e.g. am out with family, friends, at work. She also does this when i am in no state to discuss her points or calm her down e.g. right before crucial medical appointments. I think this is unreasonable and is greatly affecting me.

Hi all,

I've been with my GF for just under a year- could do with some advice as its my first real relationship.

Whenever my girlfriend is upset- she cant stop herself from fighting. For example, if I'm out with my family for dinner she'll send me numerous messages about how she's upset about something- il tell her im really sorry, il phone her as soon as im done with my family dinner- but she'll keep going and send me messages for hours on end about how upset she is etc even though I've asked her to stop.

This may sound quite minor but its taking a toll on me because it happens all the time and it is so intense- eg when im out with my friends, driving, at work. It affects my ability to focus and be happy emotionally as it is so intense and so frequent- so many angry and intense messages over such a short period of time.

Its happened for example when im driving- il tell her please im driving can you not message me so aggressively for a while until I've parked because its distracting me- but she'll ignore me and keep going.

I think these discussions should be able to wait until both parties are ready, and shouldn't be so intense.

Can people please let me know their thoughts on this? Is it normal when someone's upset for them to not be able to control themselves in this way?

Personally I'm always able to control myself and always respect her time.



Submitted January 03, 2020 at 12:07AM

Tl;DR: When my GF is upset, she will send a barrage of angry messages regardless of whether i am available to talk e.g. am out with family, friends, at work. She also does this when i am in no state to discuss her points or calm her down e.g. right before crucial medical appointments. I think this is unreasonable and is greatly affecting me.Hi all,I've been with my GF for just under a year- could do with some advice as its my first real relationship.Whenever my girlfriend is upset- she cant stop herself from fighting. For example, if I'm out with my family for dinner she'll send me numerous messages about how she's upset about something- il tell her im really sorry, il phone her as soon as im done with my family dinner- but she'll keep going and send me messages for hours on end about how upset she is etc even though I've asked her to stop.This may sound quite minor but its taking a toll on me because it happens all the time and it is so intense- eg when im out with my friends, driving, at work. It affects my ability to focus and be happy emotionally as it is so intense and so frequent- so many angry and intense messages over such a short period of time.Its happened for example when im driving- il tell her please im driving can you not message me so aggressively for a while until I've parked because its distracting me- but she'll ignore me and keep going.I think these discussions should be able to wait until both parties are ready, and shouldn't be so intense.Can people please let me know their thoughts on this? Is it normal when someone's upset for them to not be able to control themselves in this way?Personally I'm always able to control myself and always respect her time.
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