Im scared of getting an STI from kissing

I also posted this on r/sex because I didn’t know where it would be better to post.

I (15F) have been in a relationship for almost two months now, and my (15M) boyfriend and I still haven’t had our first kiss. I’m gonna have him come over during winter break, and I’m really hoping that we will finally kiss then. The thing is, Im in the sex education unit in health, and we are currently learning about STIs. We learned that kissing is usually safe, but today we learned about syphilis, and how it can be transmitted through open sores.

My boyfriend and I talk about sex and all that stuff all the time, but it’s never about us having it. Although he honestly makes a lot of hints that he wants to smash, and I find it very flattering, but I don’t actually think he’s gonna do anything. And if he does, then I’m gonna tell him I’m not ready. However, I do want to kiss. I’ve been fantasizing about kissing him for ages, and now I really want it to happen, but now that I learned this info in my health class, I’m actually quite scared. I’m really paranoid. Like, the first stage of syphilis is an open sore, the second stage are flu like symptoms, and the third stage is after about fifteen to twenty years, and it’s nerve damage, and even the possibility of death.

I know for a fact that I have no STIs cause I’ve never kissed anyone on the lips before, and obviously never had any sexual intercourse. My boyfriend on the other hand, well, I don’t know. I know that he had his first kiss before. I also know that he dated around a lot in middle school, then in high school he was in one previous relationship before we started dating. So honestly, I don’t even know if he’s still a virgin. I kinda get vibes that he isn’t. And if he’s not, I have no idea who he’s done it with, and how many people he’s done it with.

Obviously, I’d want to ask him about this, but I just can’t. Like, it would be so awkward!!! What would I even say? “Hey, are you still a virgin or nah?” Or “Yo, you got any STDs?” Pffffft that sounds awful. Im just kidding, I wouldn’t say it like that if I were to talk to him about it, but still. It would just be a very uncomfortable situation, and I don’t wanna ruin the mood between us. Perhaps if he were to actually try and go down on me I’d talk to him about it then (after telling him that I choose abstinence). But kissing, well, I feel awkward talking to him about all this before a simple kiss. Kissing happens all the time, and I see it everywhere. I don’t want to be scared of kissing him or anything, cause I’ve been dreaming of doing it for months! But now I just feel paranoid :(

I also remembered that herpes can be transmitted through kissing too... AHH

Im terribly afraid of STIs and really don’t wanna get one. So I guess my question is, is kissing a common way of spreading STIs? Should I be worried? What should I do?

Submitted December 19, 2019 at 11:48PM

I also posted this on r/sex because I didn’t know where it would be better to post.I (15F) have been in a relationship for almost two months now, and my (15M) boyfriend and I still haven’t had our first kiss. I’m gonna have him come over during winter break, and I’m really hoping that we will finally kiss then. The thing is, Im in the sex education unit in health, and we are currently learning about STIs. We learned that kissing is usually safe, but today we learned about syphilis, and how it can be transmitted through open sores.My boyfriend and I talk about sex and all that stuff all the time, but it’s never about us having it. Although he honestly makes a lot of hints that he wants to smash, and I find it very flattering, but I don’t actually think he’s gonna do anything. And if he does, then I’m gonna tell him I’m not ready. However, I do want to kiss. I’ve been fantasizing about kissing him for ages, and now I really want it to happen, but now that I learned this info in my health class, I’m actually quite scared. I’m really paranoid. Like, the first stage of syphilis is an open sore, the second stage are flu like symptoms, and the third stage is after about fifteen to twenty years, and it’s nerve damage, and even the possibility of death.I know for a fact that I have no STIs cause I’ve never kissed anyone on the lips before, and obviously never had any sexual intercourse. My boyfriend on the other hand, well, I don’t know. I know that he had his first kiss before. I also know that he dated around a lot in middle school, then in high school he was in one previous relationship before we started dating. So honestly, I don’t even know if he’s still a virgin. I kinda get vibes that he isn’t. And if he’s not, I have no idea who he’s done it with, and how many people he’s done it with.Obviously, I’d want to ask him about this, but I just can’t. Like, it would be so awkward!!! What would I even say? “Hey, are you still a virgin or nah?” Or “Yo, you got any STDs?” Pffffft that sounds awful. Im just kidding, I wouldn’t say it like that if I were to talk to him about it, but still. It would just be a very uncomfortable situation, and I don’t wanna ruin the mood between us. Perhaps if he were to actually try and go down on me I’d talk to him about it then (after telling him that I choose abstinence). But kissing, well, I feel awkward talking to him about all this before a simple kiss. Kissing happens all the time, and I see it everywhere. I don’t want to be scared of kissing him or anything, cause I’ve been dreaming of doing it for months! But now I just feel paranoid :(I also remembered that herpes can be transmitted through kissing too... AHHIm terribly afraid of STIs and really don’t wanna get one. So I guess my question is, is kissing a common way of spreading STIs? Should I be worried? What should I do?