I [F20s] don't know how to deal with this rut in my long term relationship

Hello,

I have made a post before about how I think I am falling out of love with my current partner. We have been together a long time (more than 10 years). I started being less "interested" in him a couple months ago. I started going out more and spending more time with friends (either IRL or chatting on Instagram/Messenger) because I found anything my SO said annoying or meaningless. I reject his kisses and cuddles because I don't feel like it. Thing is, I do like him as a person. We tried talking, but he's bad at communication and I am kind of a mess right now, so I didn't know how to convey my feelings correctly. There is no one else. I'm just in a weird lull where I think I might have settled for him. He is my first serious relationship. I'm scared I missed out on something... But if I'm happy, all this shouldn't matter, right? I can't help feeling guilty about everything, but at the same time I'm not sure I'm truly happy. There's also the sex aspect, but that's another talk for another time. What keeps me from breaking it off is everything we did together. We are very good friends, we have our own place together, etc.

Do I need professional help? I don't know what's wrong with me. A couple years ago I couldn't imagine my life without him. That hasn't changed, but not for the same reasons. Anyone been in this situation before? Any input or help would be appreciated.

Of course, this is a throwaway. I don't want this mess tied to my original account. TL;DR I like my SO but I am annoyed at pretty much everything he does and feel less attracted. I don't know how to deal with it.



Submitted December 28, 2019 at 12:04AM

Hello,I have made a post before about how I think I am falling out of love with my current partner. We have been together a long time (more than 10 years). I started being less "interested" in him a couple months ago. I started going out more and spending more time with friends (either IRL or chatting on Instagram/Messenger) because I found anything my SO said annoying or meaningless. I reject his kisses and cuddles because I don't feel like it. Thing is, I do like him as a person. We tried talking, but he's bad at communication and I am kind of a mess right now, so I didn't know how to convey my feelings correctly. There is no one else. I'm just in a weird lull where I think I might have settled for him. He is my first serious relationship. I'm scared I missed out on something... But if I'm happy, all this shouldn't matter, right? I can't help feeling guilty about everything, but at the same time I'm not sure I'm truly happy. There's also the sex aspect, but that's another talk for another time. What keeps me from breaking it off is everything we did together. We are very good friends, we have our own place together, etc.Do I need professional help? I don't know what's wrong with me. A couple years ago I couldn't imagine my life without him. That hasn't changed, but not for the same reasons. Anyone been in this situation before? Any input or help would be appreciated.Of course, this is a throwaway. I don't want this mess tied to my original account. TL;DR I like my SO but I am annoyed at pretty much everything he does and feel less attracted. I don't know how to deal with it.
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