[26F] sister asked me [25F] if I want to split their thanksgiving expenses

Backstory: my sister and I are both newly married. My husband makes good money as a physical therapist but I only work part time and make minimal money. My sister is a teacher and her husband works as a chef at various part time jobs.

They just bought a house, we are saving for a house but our current savings along with his debt and our budget just don’t support buying a house right now.

My sister invited us to Thanksgiving and asked if we could make two dishes to bring, I am making roasted vegetables and stuffing. She plans on making a turkey mashed potatoes pumpkin pie cranberry sauce and green beans.

Today I get a text if we are willing to split the cost of their grocery shopping for Thanksgiving because they have had a lot of costs recently with their move and life etc. “Hey so with our recent expenses would you guys mind paying for half of the thanksgiving groceries?”

As I am not the primary person who brings money to the household being asked makes me uncomfortable anyway as it’s not really my entire decision. In addition it’s not up to me if they buy the more expensive alternatives, how much of it, organic etc.

In addition I have dietary restrictions and probably will not be eating much of the food at all.

I just feel it’s an awkward question to ask so last second too and I don’t want to come off as rude or make any awkward situations during thanksgiving dinner if I were to say no (not saying this is my answer).

How should I approach this in a tactful way?

Tldr: sister asks last second if we can split theirThanksgiving grocery bill while we are also contributing side dishes.



Submitted November 25, 2019 at 11:22PM

Backstory: my sister and I are both newly married. My husband makes good money as a physical therapist but I only work part time and make minimal money. My sister is a teacher and her husband works as a chef at various part time jobs.They just bought a house, we are saving for a house but our current savings along with his debt and our budget just don’t support buying a house right now.My sister invited us to Thanksgiving and asked if we could make two dishes to bring, I am making roasted vegetables and stuffing. She plans on making a turkey mashed potatoes pumpkin pie cranberry sauce and green beans.Today I get a text if we are willing to split the cost of their grocery shopping for Thanksgiving because they have had a lot of costs recently with their move and life etc. “Hey so with our recent expenses would you guys mind paying for half of the thanksgiving groceries?”As I am not the primary person who brings money to the household being asked makes me uncomfortable anyway as it’s not really my entire decision. In addition it’s not up to me if they buy the more expensive alternatives, how much of it, organic etc.In addition I have dietary restrictions and probably will not be eating much of the food at all.I just feel it’s an awkward question to ask so last second too and I don’t want to come off as rude or make any awkward situations during thanksgiving dinner if I were to say no (not saying this is my answer).How should I approach this in a tactful way?Tldr: sister asks last second if we can split theirThanksgiving grocery bill while we are also contributing side dishes.
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