(24f) my friends acting distant when they get boyfriends

My friends and I have all been super close the last few years, with none of us gavjng serious relationships. I have never had a serious boyfriend.

However, two of my closest friends recently have gotten boyfriends. I moved two hours awaysince then So I haven’t been around them much. But I am worried that they are going into MIA boyfriend mode.

For example, I planned a Friendsgiving and invited my one friend S. I planned this like a month ago and she had been saying she missed me and was excited for this dinner. However, the day of the event came and she ended up not coming because her bf came to town to visit and they wanted to watch a fight. I was pretty upset, I haven’t seen her in a month. She said she was sorry, but I never responded to her text. She doesn’t seem to care much cause she hasn’t reached back out since. We rarely talk since she got her new boyfriend.

My one friend A also has similar habits. This was someone I called my best friend for years, but then she started dating someone and now we never speak. I last spoke(including texting & snap chatting) on her bday in October. She comes to my city to visit her boyfriend- but often doesn’t even tell me she’s here and I see that she’s in town by her stories. She responded to my story today and asked if I was home, and I just feel like it’s forced/ weird now. Like she’s only reaching out once every few months when it’s convenient for her.

I don’t know what to do cause I think it is normal for people to pair off. It’s hard for me to understand cause I never have relationships and run on my own mostly. But how can I accept that? It makes me sad to think I will lose these friendships once everyone gets a boyfriend.

tl;dr: friends not speaking to me as much when they get boyfriends and seeming to not care anymore



Submitted November 25, 2019 at 11:04PM

My friends and I have all been super close the last few years, with none of us gavjng serious relationships. I have never had a serious boyfriend.However, two of my closest friends recently have gotten boyfriends. I moved two hours awaysince then So I haven’t been around them much. But I am worried that they are going into MIA boyfriend mode.For example, I planned a Friendsgiving and invited my one friend S. I planned this like a month ago and she had been saying she missed me and was excited for this dinner. However, the day of the event came and she ended up not coming because her bf came to town to visit and they wanted to watch a fight. I was pretty upset, I haven’t seen her in a month. She said she was sorry, but I never responded to her text. She doesn’t seem to care much cause she hasn’t reached back out since. We rarely talk since she got her new boyfriend.My one friend A also has similar habits. This was someone I called my best friend for years, but then she started dating someone and now we never speak. I last spoke(including texting & snap chatting) on her bday in October. She comes to my city to visit her boyfriend- but often doesn’t even tell me she’s here and I see that she’s in town by her stories. She responded to my story today and asked if I was home, and I just feel like it’s forced/ weird now. Like she’s only reaching out once every few months when it’s convenient for her.I don’t know what to do cause I think it is normal for people to pair off. It’s hard for me to understand cause I never have relationships and run on my own mostly. But how can I accept that? It makes me sad to think I will lose these friendships once everyone gets a boyfriend.tl;dr: friends not speaking to me as much when they get boyfriends and seeming to not care anymore
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Add Comments, Posts, Links... etc.

Popular posts from this blog

The difference between being right and being understood

My boyfriend and I are 28. We’ve been together for about 1.5 years and recently moved in together. He’s a pretty patient and easygoing person (Type B) whereas I’m more particular (Type A). Of course there are two sides to every trait, and my Type A nature benefits us in some ways too. Like all couples, we have differences in perspective or preference. When this happens, he will usually say something like “I disagree (with your perspective) but fine.” I tend to push the issue in an attempt to get him to understand where I’m coming from. This escalates the disagreement into a fight because he perceives it as me trying to be “right”. I truly just want to be understood (and I want to understand where he’s coming from) so I’m looking for more of a dialogue whereas he avoids conflict and just wants it to be over as quickly as possible. His general approach is “agree to disagree” but that doesn’t make sense to me when it’s an issue that will keep coming up and requires compromise. I’m n
Read more

My (27f) gf (27f) is getting tired of me not sharing intimate/ personal info about me

I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love with her, however I can not seem to open up... and I can tell it’s frustrating to her by the way she tells me it bothers her that she feels she’s the only one committed and the one that’s always sharing... At this point I don’t even know if it is that I’ve gotten too used to it, to the point I’ve became lazy to talk about myself or give any genuine personal opinion... it sucks, really, I need to communicate better... Where do I start? Tl;dr: I can’t be completely intimate with my gf and its frustrating her, I need to communicate better because I really love her... where to start? Submitted April 25, 2019 at 06:02AM I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love
Read more

My (23M) girlfriend (25F) relationship is confusing to me. I might be the problem, or maybe we are just incompatible.

I met my girlfriend after a few serious breakups that led me to change both intentionally and unintentionally over a few years. For better and for worse. She had just gotten out of an engagement with a verbally and physically abusive man who had a cocaine problem. We have been together about 8 months now. We hit it off and spent a lot of time together but she began to push our relationship as if there were a time clock for milestones. I was pressed beyond my comfort zone and went with it because of my affection for her. My living situation fell apart and I lost a few thousand dollars to shit roommates right around the time she and I met and she offered to let me stay with her. I agreed with some resistance. I pay for food, help her with bills, and throw money toward rent while trying to get back on my feet. As long as we have been together she has gotten more possessive, angry, and irrational. She is dealing with shit from her engagement and I feel shes looking for a level of seriou
Read more