My [50F] mom thinks I [20F] should break up with my boyfriend [19M]. What should I do?

Hi Reddit,

English isn't my first language, so please excuse me if there are any mistakes.

First of all, my mom isn't controlling at all. Honestly, she's my best friend and she always gives me the best advice. But right now I'm really confused and scared. I don't know what to do.

My current situation is that I recently got admitted to university. I'll be studying abroad for at least 3 years, so that means I'll have to be in a LDR. My bf and I have been dating for a little bit over one year. He's my first boyfriend. He's honestly the best boyfriend I could ask for. He's kind, gentle, understanding, thoughtful... He makes me feel so loved and I love him too.

I really want to make this work, but my mom thinks it's a bad idea for the following reasons: - It's important that I enjoy my first year in uni without any ties to worry about. She says spending all of my time in my room talking to him on the phone while other students are building their social lives won't do me any good. - She thinks it's most likely that we'll have to break up at a certain point since it seems like we're going different ways, and it would be easier to do it now and turn the page easily thanks to the new uni life than to have to grieve alone in a foreign country. - She thinks my boyfriend isn't emotionally mature. He talks to me about wanting to marry me and calls me the love of his life, my mom thinks it doesn't make sense for a 19 yo to be making this kind of promises. - As for now, my bf doesn't know what to do with his life. He has a part time job, and doesn't know for sure what he'll be doing next year. - She thinks it's crazy to settle for someone at the age of 20, that I have to date a few more people until I find the right person.

I've been crying non-stop for the past 2 days. I had the best time of my life with my boyfriend, he's my best friend and I want to make things work with him. But I'm also a reasonable person and I try to think thoroughly before making any decision. I'm also scared I'm never going to find someone that will love me as my bf does, or someone that I will care about as much as I care about him. What to do? Has anyone ever been in the same situation?

--- TL;DR: --- I'm going to study abroad for 3 years. I have been dating my bf for 1 year. He doesn't know what to do with his life as for now. My mom thinks it's better to break up now than later. I really love him and I'm not sure I'll ever find someone like him. I'm so sad. Help me.



Submitted June 23, 2019 at 11:44PM

Hi Reddit,English isn't my first language, so please excuse me if there are any mistakes.First of all, my mom isn't controlling at all. Honestly, she's my best friend and she always gives me the best advice. But right now I'm really confused and scared. I don't know what to do.My current situation is that I recently got admitted to university. I'll be studying abroad for at least 3 years, so that means I'll have to be in a LDR. My bf and I have been dating for a little bit over one year. He's my first boyfriend. He's honestly the best boyfriend I could ask for. He's kind, gentle, understanding, thoughtful... He makes me feel so loved and I love him too.I really want to make this work, but my mom thinks it's a bad idea for the following reasons: - It's important that I enjoy my first year in uni without any ties to worry about. She says spending all of my time in my room talking to him on the phone while other students are building their social lives won't do me any good. - She thinks it's most likely that we'll have to break up at a certain point since it seems like we're going different ways, and it would be easier to do it now and turn the page easily thanks to the new uni life than to have to grieve alone in a foreign country. - She thinks my boyfriend isn't emotionally mature. He talks to me about wanting to marry me and calls me the love of his life, my mom thinks it doesn't make sense for a 19 yo to be making this kind of promises. - As for now, my bf doesn't know what to do with his life. He has a part time job, and doesn't know for sure what he'll be doing next year. - She thinks it's crazy to settle for someone at the age of 20, that I have to date a few more people until I find the right person.I've been crying non-stop for the past 2 days. I had the best time of my life with my boyfriend, he's my best friend and I want to make things work with him. But I'm also a reasonable person and I try to think thoroughly before making any decision. I'm also scared I'm never going to find someone that will love me as my bf does, or someone that I will care about as much as I care about him. What to do? Has anyone ever been in the same situation?--- TL;DR: --- I'm going to study abroad for 3 years. I have been dating my bf for 1 year. He doesn't know what to do with his life as for now. My mom thinks it's better to break up now than later. I really love him and I'm not sure I'll ever find someone like him. I'm so sad. Help me.
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