Being misunderstood in society. This is more or less prominent depending on which culture you come from: being told you are “incomplete” or “weird” because “you’re not married and have no children at your age.” It does feel ostracizing at times. October 01, 2023 at 12:15AM

Any advice? Games, quiz, anything outside the box? Submitted October 01, 2023 at 12:16AM Any advice?Games, quiz, anything outside the box?

So I 20M, want to get back into dating after getting out of a 3 year relationship back in march, but I’m having problems meeting new people. I took a year off school, so I’m currently at home working. I’ve been using dating apps, but nothing ever goes anywhere with those. I was just wondering if anyone new any good ways to get out somewhere and talk, because im much better at that then just texting people and nothing else. Submitted September 30, 2023 at 12:13AM So I 20M, want to get back into dating after getting out of a 3 year relationship back in march, but I’m having problems meeting new people. I took a year off school, so I’m currently at home working. I’ve been using dating apps, but nothing ever goes anywhere with those. I was just wondering if anyone new any good ways to get out somewhere and talk, because im much better at that then just texting people and nothing else.

I am into nerdy guys but i dont know where to find this men. Can somebody give me suggestions? Please dont say dating apps... Submitted September 30, 2023 at 12:14AM I am into nerdy guys but i dont know where to find this men. Can somebody give me suggestions?Please dont say dating apps...

Was gonna say, we old folks grew up as the internet began. We're definitely here. September 28, 2023 at 10:30PM

I literally got asked this by my roommate on the first day of college. Normally with celebrities I say "they're not ugly" which just makes people laugh and move on, but this was a person we were sitting like two tables away from. I said something very noncommittal and tried to redirect the conversation. September 28, 2023 at 10:27PM

he’s a rapist actually. September 28, 2023 at 10:27PM

No. There is a correlation between autism and identifying as something/someone outside of the average in general. This is likely because individuals with autism are less likely to confirm to and more likely to challenge the status quo . Basically, compulsive heterosexuality/ cisnormativity / etc isn't as effective on autistic people as it is on alloistic people, which typically translates to autistic people understanding that they are queer faster than their alloistic counterparts. September 28, 2023 at 10:27PM

Really interesting question I generally take the approach with labels (like "ace") that people should be able to self identify. The definition of these things is not concrete (and shouldn't be in my opinion). So by saying they are ace they are saying "this label has meaning to me at the moment". Maybe it won't in the future but if it's helpful now it's totally valid. I say this as a trans ace woman in a relationship with a woman. The idea that I had to meet some requirement to be "truly" trans tore me up for ages. But realizing it was just a label without a concrete definition was helpful to me to accept myself. Because it means only I can say if the label means something to me. September 28, 2023 at 10:23PM

As a fictosexual asexual, I think it's the same kind of feeling allos have for their gender(s) of choice. I'm a bit sex repulsed by the real thing because ew-germs-bodily-fluids-gross but when it's not a real person then the idea of sexual attraction suddenly makes a whole lot more sense to me because there are certain characters I absolutely would not mind doing the deed with BECAUSE I know it legitimately could not happen. September 27, 2023 at 11:17PM

Fictosexuals unite! ✊ If doing the deed with a real person doesn't ignite anything for you when you think about it, then you're still asexual. I'm a sexrepulsed ace because the deed itself with another real person grosses me out. However, you set any of my favorite certain fictional characters in front of me I will jump their bones 🤣 September 27, 2023 at 11:11PM

If you're a teen chances are he might not take it seriously until you're an adult, unfortunately. If you're an adult, just tell him that you're not into girls nor guys, that they both are the same to you and neither is appealing. Sure, there's the chance your dad might think you're gay/lesbian so don't say it unless it's worth it. You can also say that dating never appealed to you and kissing a person has the same appeal of kissing a wall. You wouldn't even have to use the word "asexual" bc I think the message is pretty obvious here September 27, 2023 at 11:09PM

I have. But does QPR inherently mean same-sex? Because I'm not really interested in forming a relationship like that with a man. September 27, 2023 at 11:08PM

To most people, no means no and yes means yes in a vanilla situation. I have also never tried sex and I'm not planning to, but a safe word is a great choice for all types of sexual intimacy. It could be because it's easier to say something like "red light" instead of no because even in vanilla situations, people might try to be coy and say 'no' without actually meaning 'no'. This is where a safe word comes in, saying something that isn't usually said during usually kinda triggers a stop button in someone's brain because it's not a coy 'no' it's Strawberry or something. It helps create a non-negotiable boundary that helps keep both parties safe and content in a situation. It also helps keep the confusion of "did they mean no or are they just saying no?" out of the picture. I hope this helps! September 27, 2023 at 11:07PM

I have surprisingly seen religious based hate against aces. Stuff about how it's unnatural, God wants you to have sex, God wants you to have kids, etc. September 26, 2023 at 11:36PM

Want and need, for themselves, not have a duty to, should do regardless, must do to keep a relationship or feel normal. No one should ever feel they owe sex, coerced sex is not sex, its noncon. September 26, 2023 at 11:36PM

There's a good chance that a lot of ace men just... aren't good at this stuff. In a lot of relationships, women can be somewhat passive participants. As you already mentioned, you find it unusual that you have to actually put yourself out there and make the first move. Because of that, allosexual men who are looking to date pretty much have to train themselves to be engaging, to push the conversation and to impress the women who receive however many other options. They have to stand out and they have to learn to stand out. But ace men are far less likely to have that experience. If they aren't actively searching for sexual relationships, they are unlikely to have developed those same skills that largely exist to search for relationships. An ace woman can just sort of stumble into a relationship with allosexual men. An ace man would have to actively hunt for a relationship with allosexual women. September 26, 2023 at 11:34PM

yeah i do understand about the different types of love and the fact that it can take many failed dates to get any potential but recently, like the last couple months i’ve been wondering if that’s even something i genuinely want, or if it’s just because everyone around me is doing it i like the idea of a romantic relationship but at the same time i don’t feel like i need one or even always want one, im not sure if i’ve ever had an actual crush, growing up it was more of a pick the boy who looks ‘attractive’ and is nice but i can’t really see myself in a proper romantic relationship with anyone but who knows thanks for replying btw September 26, 2023 at 11:32PM

That’s so true! I keep forgetting that there are a lot more people on Tinder than acespace or other sites Aww and congrats! Thank you so much! Hope you have a great day! September 26, 2023 at 11:29PM

yeah im pretty much the same, they are just ugly imo lol September 26, 2023 at 11:27PM

The cis straights were never okay September 25, 2023 at 11:20PM

I sure did! I think my mom might be acespec, too bc she still repeats a lot of this stuff. So I got it from society at large and my mom telling me that sex is something only men want. September 25, 2023 at 11:20PM

To be honest, I feel like "fixing" is worse than ostracization, considering the ugly history of conversion therapy and corrective rape. September 24, 2023 at 10:17PM

´´you are only in a stage of denial´´ I was in a stage of denial towards my asexuality for 6 years, she doesn't know what it cost me to accept myself, and the worst thing is that, that comment came from someone who supposedly supported the LGBT community, and would support me if I were from that community, thats hurt me September 24, 2023 at 10:16PM

I (f25) am asking for advice on where to find a man without dating apps. Where do people go to mingle with others besides the bar?? Submitted September 23, 2023 at 11:59PM I (f25) am asking for advice on where to find a man without dating apps. Where do people go to mingle with others besides the bar??

Someone asked me if I have reproductive parts. Like seriously?? September 23, 2023 at 12:12AM

I knew a boy all throughout middle school and we weren’t really friends and we went our separate ways after graduation, especially cause my eight grade year was online mostly. He was always really cute and nice in middle school and I always had a little thing for him. I hadn’t thought out of him really since middle school until a few months back I had a dream about him and considering dming him bht decided not to to not weird him out. I went to homecoming with a friend who goes to same school as my middle school crush and saw him. I couldn’t stop thinking about him after that and dmed him saying “hey, I saw you at your schools homecoming when I went with a friend and just wanted to say hi!” I didn’t really expect a response but he responded that it was great to hear from me and asked how I was. I said I was good and hearted the message he sent. Since then I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him and have been considering asking him to hang out and catch up, but I’m worried that ...

A girl and I have been talking for the past month. She’s only just got out of a relationship. She has openly said she’s a very sexual person, to point she even tells me she’s horny. So, you’d think I’m a booty call or FWB right? Well she doesn’t want to meet me as she’s “not ready” which is fair enough. She has only just got out of a relationship maybe a month and a half ago. So tonight we were talking about stuff, and then she hits me with a random nude. I didn’t mind, but still. She’s never sent this before. I naturally responded with surprise and she was also asking for pictures and videos. She’s never asked this before either. It’s not out of character for her though, as she has said before she kinda does it when she’s horny and likes getting stuff back. I never asked her for this picture, but she has sent soft teases before, also without me asking. However im also only guy she’s “talking” to (I know she’s not lying about this, she’s stated multiple times she keeps ghosting guy...

I can’t seem to figure out why no one asks me out or even hits on me in public. I’m 23 and realistically I’m not ugly. I know my body could use work, I’m a size 14, but it’s not horrendous and I have hair that reaches my butt. My eyes are pretty and skin is clear. I’m relatively friendly but I do talk a lot and can be annoying but to strangers I can be charming. I’m able to talk to strangers, I have friends, a job, a car. Hobbies like going to concerts, spending time in coffee and book and music stores. I’m a little socially awkward but it’s not life altering. Everyone around me says I’m pretty and doesn’t give me any advice on how I can actually get men to hit my line. I’ve had four or five dates lined up in the past month where the guys block me right after we make plans even though we have stated we want to go and that we both mutually agree we are attracted to each other. I suffer from low self esteem due to childhood bullying and getting rejected is just getting harder and harder...

Long story short Im in college and just asked this shy girl for her number so we could possibly hangout and she said "i guess, yeah" and put her number in my phone. I just ask because she didnt seem to enthusiastic about it lol and I rarely put myself out there so dont have much experience. Should I pursue later this week or try with someone else? Thanks Submitted September 23, 2023 at 12:08AM Long story short Im in college and just asked this shy girl for her number so we could possibly hangout and she said "i guess, yeah" and put her number in my phone. I just ask because she didnt seem to enthusiastic about it lol and I rarely put myself out there so dont have much experience. Should I pursue later this week or try with someone else? Thanks

Im pretty clueless when it comes to women and their hints never been good at understanding em personally. Today at the towards the end of my shift i was asked to help this girl who ive seen around work but never had any reason to talk to, we tend to make eye contact with one another from a distance but nothing serious. While helping her today one of her first questions was “do you have any kids?” My response was “no not yet, hopefully one day though i’m still a bit young” so i asked if she had any and her response was something like “yeah i have a son” (her cat lol) would this be considered anything more than friendly coworker banter or am i making up things? Submitted September 23, 2023 at 12:17AM Im pretty clueless when it comes to women and their hints never been good at understanding em personally.Today at the towards the end of my shift i was asked to help this girl who ive seen around work but never had any reason to talk to, we tend to make eye contact with one another f...

I don’t want to bother my friends with this so I am resorting to reddit for relationship advice lol… anyway here goes: I met a guy from a dating app a month ago. We really hit it off. We’ve seen each other 4 times since then. Everytime we have gone on a date it was because I asked except for one time. We have always taken a while to respond to each other but our texts would be great full of questions and all that jazz. (Honestly I don’t care if someone takes a day to respond as long as what they respond with matches the energy my texts give.)But then after a couple weeks Well he would take an average 24hrs to respond (which is fine) but then the replies would be kind of dry. I asked him to hangout again and see what would happen, maybe things would end after this? But this last time we went on a date we ended up having a 9 hour long date and it was honestly an amazing time! We finally kissed too. Definitely worth losing sleep over. During the end of the date he admitted that he wa...

I (f20) have literally never been single, i got my first “serious” bf in 4th grade and we dated until 7th. The longest i have ever been single was for the entirety of 8th grade. I got with my next bf the summer before high school and we were together for 2 years, he was very toxic and abusive but i was more scared of being alone than of him. When we broke up I immediately found someone new then we were together for a year and a half on and off. When that ended (bc he became heavily addicted to drugs) i, again, like immediately found someone new, we broke up in the beginning of the summer because he decided to go to a far away college and i am not about long distance. I was single for ONE W H O L E hot girl summer (the longest i have been single since 8th grade) and I discovered that i can pretty much have anyone i want, it was very liberating and awesome. Now here is the problem. At the very end of that summer i found the PERFECT guy, he is so much better than anyone i have ever dated...

I have class with this girl who I think is super cute and she'd sit right next to me if there were enough seats left. Occasionally I catch her stealing a glance at me (or so I think). We'd walk and talk after class as well. One day I approach her on campus to say hello and she offers to study together on an upcoming exam, I mentioned we should swap phone numbers and a few days later we study together just a few hours before the exam itself. She mentioned that she really appreciated the help and I said that we can make it a regular thing before every exam we would have and she agreed. I wanna ask if she wants to hangout but she only ever really texts me if its related to class and I'm not getting the vibe that she's interested. Should I ask her out> Should I wait until she makes a move? Submitted September 21, 2023 at 11:58PM I have class with this girl who I think is super cute and she'd sit right next to me if there were enough seats left. Occasionally ...

M18 5'5. I already know most women don't like short men, but it seems especially true for short women. I'm wanting to hear other short mens experiences with women of various heights? Do you think it would be best for my mental health to just avoid short women? And what can I do to improve my chances as a short guy? Submitted September 21, 2023 at 11:58PM M18 5'5. I already know most women don't like short men, but it seems especially true for short women. I'm wanting to hear other short mens experiences with women of various heights? Do you think it would be best for my mental health to just avoid short women? And what can I do to improve my chances as a short guy?

I started talking to this girl a little while ago and we have been talking everyday. Things have been going great. She has been showing high interest, asking to ft and asking when I would come see her. We ft’d last night and it seemed to go well, her energy was good as she was laughing a lot. All of a sudden today she has been leaving me on read. I doubled texted once but I dont wanna keep on doing that….I think Im just gonna move on. I dont think she is interested anymore after the ft call. Submitted September 22, 2023 at 12:07AM I started talking to this girl a little while ago and we have been talking everyday. Things have been going great. She has been showing high interest, asking to ft and asking when I would come see her. We ft’d last night and it seemed to go well, her energy was good as she was laughing a lot. All of a sudden today she has been leaving me on read. I doubled texted once but I dont wanna keep on doing that….I think Im just gonna move on. I dont think she ...

I matched with a friend of a friend whom I’ve never met, on Hinge; I have only seen her on my friend’s instagram posts and my friend is in some pictures of her hinge profile. How would you open a conversation with her, do I mention our mutual friend at first or just like talk to her normally and not mention my friend? Submitted September 22, 2023 at 12:12AM I matched with a friend of a friend whom I’ve never met, on Hinge; I have only seen her on my friend’s instagram posts and my friend is in some pictures of her hinge profile. How would you open a conversation with her, do I mention our mutual friend at first or just like talk to her normally and not mention my friend?

So basically I've had a crush in my lead at work for the past two years that I've known her. She always tells me I'm doing great and we talk at work but we never talk outside of work. Anyways she's leaving and getting a new job and her last day is this Friday so I wanted to ask her out. She's not a huge social media person so I wrote her a note (because she's still my lead and that's not appropriate until she isn't my lead) and I put on the note to not read it until after her last day. I haven't left the note for her yet because I'm conflicted. I'm not normally a person to ask someone out with a note, but this time it's just too much for me, plus she still works here. My best friend told me to go for it, but my other friends and some very close coworkers have told me not to. I just wanted some more input on the matter. Please don't judge me too hard, I haven't been in a serious relationship for over 6 years Submitted Septembe...

Someone finally said it! September 19, 2023 at 10:57PM

I recently had a bad breakup. It was terrible. And so, just as a mind-diverting activity, I downloaded a dating app where I matched with a guy. I was visiting another city during vacation, where the guy lived.. but it was my last day so I couldn’t go on a real date with him or even meet. I specifically mentioned 10 mins into the convo, “Now that you know I won’t be able to meet you, do you still wanna talk?” And he said he is okay with it. This was 5 days ago, and we have been texting and sending snaps back and forth. He replies a little late to my texts but I honestly don’t care about that. He asked for my Instagram and we started talking a little there too. We were casually talking and harmlessly flirting a little too, nothing major. But i sent him a text today and he has seen-zoned it for 7 hours. I am not sure how online dating works (I know this isn’t exactly dating), but is it common for people to leave you on seen like that? Or is he just a jerk? Submitted September 18, 2...

This guy and I have been going out on dates and he flirts a LOT. I thought I was pretty good but it gets to me sometimes and I’ll get shy, avoid eye contact and won’t be able to face him He normally just laughs but I’m not sure if this is giving more of a friend vibe than someone I’m attracted to vibe. Guys what are your opinions. Submitted September 18, 2023 at 11:59PM This guy and I have been going out on dates and he flirts a LOT. I thought I was pretty good but it gets to me sometimes and I’ll get shy, avoid eye contact and won’t be able to face himHe normally just laughs but I’m not sure if this is giving more of a friend vibe than someone I’m attracted to vibe. Guys what are your opinions.

I’m a 22 year old guy. I never been in a serious relationship I dated 2 girls ever 1 I was paired up with when I was 18 she lost interest. And a girl I met on hinge at 21 idk what happened one day she was interested next ghosting me or at least it seemed she was interested. I don’t think my looks are an issue I’m average but I have a few good features like I have blue eyes I get compliments on regularly, I tan real well, I have dark hair, was once told I had a nice ass (by a older woman). I think my biggest issue rn is meeting people and idk if it’s my social skills over text suck or what but I have a real hard time trying to keep a convo going with someone i just met over texting (like on dating app chats and stuff) I’m a lot better in person. I really want to get into a serious relationship not just a hookup and I feel like dating apps are my best bet but idk it’s hard Submitted September 19, 2023 at 12:05AM I’m a 22 year old guy. I never been in a serious relationship I da...

Need advice! I (24F) am too embarrassed to tell a friend about my current situation. I met this guy on a dating app a few weeks ago. From the start he showed strong affection for me and showered me with complements. We moved pretty quickly on a series of dates in a short period of time where I reciprocated the infatuation. Since learning more about him I have noticed some major red flags. He is comfortable stealing often, moves quickly from job to job, spends all his time wandering outside, and only wants to hang out at the park? I felt like he presented himself differently to me when we first met, like he had his life together when he clearly does not. We are scheduled to go on another date but I feel sure he is not for me. What should I do? Tell him over text message? Go on the date and tell him in person? Thank you god bless Submitted September 19, 2023 at 12:14AM Need advice! I (24F) am too embarrassed to tell a friend about my current situation. I met this guy on a dating a...

I met a guy on Bumble and we were supposed to meet at 6:30 for dinner. I texted him the night before just to confirm date, no response and I had a bad gut feeling. I texted him again at 5:00 p.m. because I didn't want to get ready and leave my house if no date was happening. He texted me saying that he was sick for the past few days but wants to reschedule for 'maybe' Thursday but will let me know later in the week. He didn't even apologize. I knew something was off. If he hasn't been feeling well for a few days, fine. Things happen, I get it but the fact that he waited an hour and a half before the date and I had to text him twice to confirm leaves a bad taste in my mouth. My friends are telling me to ghost him and I basically agree. Thoughts? Submitted September 19, 2023 at 12:15AM I met a guy on Bumble and we were supposed to meet at 6:30 for dinner. I texted him the night before just to confirm date, no response and I had a bad gut feeling. I texted him a...

I thought of aegosexual at first because you mentioned “I feel like I could…” and “I’m attracted to the possibility of…” before bellusexual . I also see someone mentioned cupiosexual, so I wanted to note the differences of all three (cupio-,aego-, and bellus-) from this discussion on the AVEN forum: I know cupio is wanting to have sexual relations while not having the "drive" to have them. Bellus is more the idea of it. The "romanticization" of sexual relations and liking the idea of that. Aego (from my limited understanding) is when you feel sexual desire towards someone, but aren't aroused by it. September 17, 2023 at 11:35PM

You keep in contact 🤷‍♀️ September 16, 2023 at 11:10PM

all im saying is while were not doing great in some areas of the country, that doesnt mean that as a whole were doing terribly. were doing a lot better than most of the world. thats not saying we dont still have room for growth at all, im not telling anyone to just deal with it. im just saying in terms of the rest of the world, were doing pretty good. and besides, its mostly a regional thing when it comes to social justice issues, and i just happen to live in a state that is very accepting of lgbtq+ individuals. thats not to say discrimination doesnt exist, and also not to say that the discrimination should just be brushed off. its just me making an observation of my surroundings, and my surroundings happen to be very open-minded. that includes my conservative family. most conservatives where i live arent far-right bigots like in other places, like most of the south. im well aware of the unfair social issues in other states, and yes, it should be addressed and fixed. but again, were d...

First one, my friends one looks just like it lmao September 15, 2023 at 10:58PM

I've always been repulsed by the concept of kissing on the lips or making out. I eventually was in a relationship I trusted enough to test it and I was right, it makes me deeply uncomfortable/I find it very unpleasant. [It's okay, though, we don't have to kiss, lol, it was just a safe, controlled situation to see]. I also will say I do like other types of kisses! I like to kiss shoulders, cheeks, foreheads, etc. I am more okay giving them than receiving them, though I am fine with them sometimes. I especially like when they're mostly silly/almost like kissing at the air. I also enjoy that I have a partner who is willing to be told "hey, actually, that's bothering me today" or "no thank you" without feeling too rejected. I will say, I did literally always look at kissing and have a negative response to seeing it. I knew I was disgusted by it, even when I tried to reframe it as something neutral in my head. If you don't feel that way, mayb...

Can you explain examples 1&2 in the SAM listed towards the end of the ppt? September 13, 2023 at 10:39PM

Not fully. Many of my family members aren't that supportive and will freak out if I tell them I'm anything but fully straight. I've only come out to my nephew and he's fully accepting of me being ace. September 13, 2023 at 10:37PM

That’s wild. I’ve never heard that before. How would they enforce that, lmao? I’m from MS and we’re way more conservative than Texas and we don’t have laws like that. September 13, 2023 at 10:34PM

I'm sorry you had this experience, and in fact, I've wondered about some version of the same. I'm from a traditional " arranged marriage" culture, and my mom was always stressing the importance of having an impeccable reputation. Which meant repressing any signs of sexuality. I've often wondered whether the consistent "self numbing" had anything to do with my asexuality. September 13, 2023 at 10:34PM

Apparently you're only allowed 5. I don't know the specific details, though. September 13, 2023 at 10:33PM

I’m the exact same!!! I am happy engaging with myself on my own, but for the idea of sex or pleasure from someone else, I’m just uninterested. It does feel forced, not in a traumatic way, just like I don’t care to engage in the first place. Which, I feel bad bc my partner wants to and on the rare occasion that I do get aroused, he wants to make me happy but I really don’t care for it. In all honesty I’d rather have sensual cuddles or entirely foreplay and then either end there or finish on my own. I’m starting to think it’s an ace thing. September 12, 2023 at 11:19PM

I get horny, and can masturbate to nothing. Maybe sometimes I’ll think of a fantasy. Absolutely no desire to live that fantasy, though. Just a fun way to keep my mind occupied. I love romance. I have romantic fantasies and feel a desire for them. Sex is never involved or even thought of in those. September 12, 2023 at 11:18PM

I’m 24F and I have two guy best friends (25M, 24M) whom I’ve grown up along the past 10 or so years. We’ve never hooked up or dated but I’m wondering that when I go out in public or just them simply being a part of my life is turning away guys who are potentially interested in me? My one of my friends (26F) mentioned that it might be a factor and so I’m curious of if it is and how big of a factor it is? Submitted September 12, 2023 at 12:02AM I’m 24F and I have two guy best friends (25M, 24M) whom I’ve grown up along the past 10 or so years. We’ve never hooked up or dated but I’m wondering that when I go out in public or just them simply being a part of my life is turning away guys who are potentially interested in me? My one of my friends (26F) mentioned that it might be a factor and so I’m curious of if it is and how big of a factor it is?

My ex of 4 years (25m) and I (24f) dated for 4 years throughout college ages 18-22. Because of that, we have many mutual friends from college. Almost every friend that we made in college is mutual to both of us. We didn’t end very amicably, but we’ve been able to maintain peaceful friendships with all of our mutual friends. My ex and I rarely communicate and we even live in different states. He lives in the Midwest , I don’t even know which state, and I live in Oregon. So there is very little chance of us crossing paths or having to see each other face-to-face if we didn’t want to . Recently our fantasy football league started up again. We’ve had the same league for five years, and it consists of my ex and I and eight other friends. Because the league was active again, people started texting in the group chat. I texted in the group chat and I didn’t think anything of it. A few days later, a girl friend in the group chat told me that my ex’s new girlfriend saw my name in the group chat...

My guy and I have been together for 19 months today. I have begged and pleaded to be represented on his social media as his girl. He's a traveler he goes all over the US. He did finally post me on his Instagram story. It was a photo of us the caption read beer and wings in our hometown. What the fuck. Is he just stringing me along with this? I've asked him if he denies me on socials because he has other girls lined up another cities. In the past I caught him with condoms in his travel bag. He refused to throw them away. Went behind my back to help his ex-girlfriend. Lied to me about the whole thing. And he kept tinder for months after we began dating. What do you think? Am I going to overboard with this? Thanks in advance 🖤 Submitted September 12, 2023 at 12:05AM My guy and I have been together for 19 months today. I have begged and pleaded to be represented on his social media as his girl. He's a traveler he goes all over the US. He did finally post me on his Insta...

So I've been on a couple dates with this guy which were both great if a little awkward but I think that's understandable, we had a date planned for tonight actually, but never nailed down a time when we talked about it a few days ago and he told me he had a super busy weekend coming up. But he hasn't texted me all day and I'm wondering if I should text him and see if everything's ok or accept the fact that I've potentially been ghosted. He's been very sweet and reassuring me that he's into me, so I don't think he'd do that, but I'm also very familiar with the knowledge that a guy doesn't just "forget" to text a girl he's really into. Just give it to me straight I gues😅 Submitted September 12, 2023 at 12:08AM So I've been on a couple dates with this guy which were both great if a little awkward but I think that's understandable, we had a date planned for tonight actually, but never nailed down a time when we t...

If you were to ask a girl to be your girlfriend and she’s not ready or wants to wait, do you wait for her to ask you to be her boyfriend or do you ask her again at a later time? Submitted September 12, 2023 at 12:10AM If you were to ask a girl to be your girlfriend and she’s not ready or wants to wait, do you wait for her to ask you to be her boyfriend or do you ask her again at a later time?

So, I had a couple of awesome dates with someone I find to be absolutely gorgeous that I met on a dating app. We agreed to meet again when we knew our upcoming schedules and texted a little. However, instead of being happy and embracing something that could’ve been a lot of fun and mutually beneficial, all I could think about was how this would end like prior flings. I’m not sure I can take the whole “you’re a great guy, but I don’t feel a spark” after weeks of seeing someone spiel again. So I deleted her number without responding - self sabotage. I thought dating and rejection would get easier over time, but the hurt only seems to have added up over time, even after taking extended breaks. Anyone ever feel like this and have thoughts on moving forward? Submitted September 12, 2023 at 12:11AM So, I had a couple of awesome dates with someone I find to be absolutely gorgeous that I met on a dating app. We agreed to meet again when we knew our upcoming schedules and texted a litt...

I’m 31/M and I’d like to start dating again, but I don’t know where to start or if I should even bother. It’s been years, but I’ve been on dates before and have experience with women. I feel like online dating is my best bet at this point of my life, but I don’t really don’t want to participate in the online dating world. I feel like I have nothing to offer at this point in my life, especially in the dating world. I’m 6’2, fit, and have a job that pays relatively well, so I guess I have some things that work in my favor. With that being said, I think status is more important than being tall and fit, and even though my job pays well enough, it’s nothing special. I feel like the only value I would ever offer to a potential partner is if I end up in a powerful job that pays me more than I make now. I accept that no woman would ever love me in my current state, and I believe I don’t deserve it. I feel like it might be best to hold off on dating until I achieve a higher status, as that is...

I’m (F25) met someone in a dating app (F24), we dated for a few weeks until she said she doesn’t want anything serious. She wants to either be friends or friends with benefits. I only want to keep good people in my life. Not sure if I should be friends with her since we’re not dating anymore. And she recently started responding to my texts late and it upset me. When I told her she said I’m overthinking and she doesn’t care. Maybe I was too confrontational? I don’t know, if I should check up on her or just move on? Here are some of her red flags: Lies about meaningless things. For example, pretending to have wanted to go to an art museum just because I like it. Or telling me she read my favorite book when she didn’t. Parties every weekend and texts me while drunk. Doesn’t have other hobbies. Came over to my apartment, didn’t eat the food I got her but drank a whole bottle of wine. Cheats in her university classes. She quit her job because she hates all of her coworkers and used ...

TLDR: I (27 M) am about to start seriously looking for someone and wanted ask what I can do to be the best me that I can be. Personal Backstory: I haven't really tried to be with anyone since high school. I was always working on something else or enjoying my time with my friends. Meeting a nice woman wasn't at the top of my list of concerns. After graduating college and working as a programmer for 2 years at John Deere in a rinky dink little town, I realized I didn't have a goal in life anymore. My job was good, and paid decent enough for my first real job out of college but I felt kind of of alone out there. So I put in my two weeks and left. Moved in with a male friend of mine in January, and I have spent the last 9 months figuring shit out. I discovered I like being around and living with other people It's nice to share my hobbies with people in person (I've spent probably to much time on discord) I want to be attracted to someone completely I want to be...

I just started talking to a girl on Hinge, I'm 25 she's 24, I'm pretty bad at texting, so advice there would be helpful too, but I somehow got her to go out with me tomorrow night, and it's been a while since I've been on a first date (tough relationship) and I have no idea how to handle myself haha. For some reason my confidence is low because she's really pretty from what I see in her pictures and I'm pretty average-below average looking. Any advice you can give me to help me make tomorrow go well is very much appreciated! Submitted September 09, 2023 at 12:15AM I just started talking to a girl on Hinge, I'm 25 she's 24, I'm pretty bad at texting, so advice there would be helpful too, but I somehow got her to go out with me tomorrow night, and it's been a while since I've been on a first date (tough relationship) and I have no idea how to handle myself haha. For some reason my confidence is low because she's really pretty fro...

Hi r/dating_advice , the question is basically the title. I always hear that women like men with charisma but I'm unsure of what this means. Does it solely mean the guy is funny or does it mean they just make good conversation? I use to do pretty well dating until I got schizophrenia and my personality was basically destroyed. I've been slowly building myself back up but still lack a lot of confidence from all the shit I've dealt with. Because of this my personality became flat and I lost anything I could guess is charisma. I think I'm finally in a place where I could have a long term relationship though. Submitted September 08, 2023 at 12:16AM Hi r/dating_advice, the question is basically the title. I always hear that women like men with charisma but I'm unsure of what this means. Does it solely mean the guy is funny or does it mean they just make good conversation? I use to do pretty well dating until I got schizophrenia and my personality was basically des...

+1 September 06, 2023 at 11:31PM

You’re welcome! I haven’t met any asexuals outside of the internet myself so it’s definitely hard to feel validated. I agree it can be hard to announce yourself publicly, for me, only a few close friends know. Though it’s not like it comes up in regular conversation to even get the opportunity to discuss my sexuality. I think from my friend’s reactions most people don’t really care. September 06, 2023 at 11:26PM

A week 1/2 ago i (28M) met a (20F) via a dating app, we texted for a couple of days and eventually agreed up on a date that same week. Took her out to eat and later that night we ended up hooking up, I used protection this whole time (provided by her) til it was time to pull out and to our surprise protection had broke and I finished inside of her. We quickly cleaned up and i gave her some money for Plan B, (which I probably should've gotten it myself that exact moment but wasnt thinking correctly). I told her to keep intouch if she needs anything... which she hasn't, so I haven't really followed up. This happend last Wednesday and been stressing ever since. What's the next steps I should take from here? Submitted September 06, 2023 at 12:15AM A week 1/2 ago i (28M) met a (20F) via a dating app, we texted for a couple of days and eventually agreed up on a date that same week. Took her out to eat and later that night we ended up hooking up, I used protection this...

haha no way 😂 it's so much more common than i think people realise! September 04, 2023 at 11:27PM

when talking with your friends, it's important to keep in mind that, often, they may not understand because these concepts can be quite new to them. the spectrum of asexuality, including aegosexuality, can be complex and not everyone may fully understand it right away. you could start by explaining that attraction and fantasy are two separate things. just because an asexual person has sexual fantasies, it does not necessarily mean they want to act on them. you could use examples or metaphors that might help them understand better. it might also be useful to send them some resources on asexuality and aegosexuality, so they can do their own education! it's not always easy, but remember, your identity is valid, and only you can define it. if they don't understand your orientation right away, that's okay too. as long as they are respectful and support you. it's completely normal to grapple with these emotions and changes. just stay true to yourself and take your tim...

About 3 months now, so I'm still buzzing. Participated in a Pride March last week and danced until I couldn't stand. There was a lesbian woman on the stage in a fishnet bodysuit (well, she had a lesbian-striped fan so I'm making assumptions here), and it kind of confirmed my asexuality that I thought she looked 'pretty good' in it. September 04, 2023 at 11:25PM

Hey so I (28f) recently met someone (35m) who seems almost perfect for me. We get along great and we have the same niche interests, he tells me I’m his ideal type of girl. I’m super hesitant to take that seriously but you know, alright, cool. I’d say the same for him. He’s here visiting his parents though and lives far away. We have been hanging out a lot, I’ve had dinner with his parents twice but he was super hesitant to meet my dad. He calls to say hi and chat about whatever on the days we don’t hang out. He says he plans on coming back soon. I also refuse to get physical with him because I don’t do that stuff unless I’m forming a relationship with someone and since he lives far away that’s not realistic. He is fine with that and says he likes that about me. He’s very handsome and I have a hard time thinking he doesn’t get female attention. He also has been excited to introduce me to his friends. We met irl not through a dating app btw about two weeks ago. He leaves a week from to...

I attended a queer group in my high school led by one of ours teachers who is openly gay and yeah.. I was mostly feeling out of place.. and not really sure if the people (other than my 2 friends) approved of me being there but the teacher tried her best to learn.. and so did I.. despite being really uncomfortable and out of place there I tried my best to make this experience into a learning moment for my future in which I hope to pursue psychology in as an understanding and helpful professional. On the sadder hand I am still the only ace I know in real life :/ It gets overwhelmingly sad and lonely at times. Mostly when a friend who thought they were ace but then found a girlfriend and now they are kinda aphobic (though I still think they are a demi, but whatever, will find out after they break up) saying how "they were just traumatized" That sucks :/ September 02, 2023 at 11:29PM

You can sort of answer their worry before hand - "No, and I'm actually very happy being single :)" September 01, 2023 at 11:18PM