Advice on how to proceed

So thats thestory (24M). I love(d) a girl (23F), which I met about 1.5yrs ago. We instantly connected and spend a lot of time together. Basically, I was extremely happy, looked forward to see her and to do stuff together, which is otherwise unlikely for me, because even though I would say that it is rather easy for me to connect with people, I also get easily bored, need plenty time for myself alone, and struggle to keep platonic relationships up for a long time. So I have a lot of vague friends, but basically no really close ones I would trust or open myself to. To continue the story I confessed my feelings to her after a few weeks and got "soft-rejected" the first time -speaking she said she is still into her ex. So we first stayed friends and after I felt she was open to something I tried again, but got actually real rejected - as she said we can still be "good friends", but we never recovered.

It was akward for a bit, but as I see her at work the relationship got better with time, but it never really healed - nobody really texts each other and we just have friendly conversations / time toghether because of work. I try to distance myself, but still have really strong feeling even after a whole year. I feel jelousy, sadness, and emptiness and she pretty much is aware of my feelings, thus I also cannot blame her for anything as I also would not want to hang out with me under this circumstances . I would really like to hang out, but I will also know that I get attached and hurt myself in the end. I am angry at myself for ruining the best friendship I had. I think it would have been benefitial to talk it out, but she really blocked of my attempts to do so - thus I gave up and now I just do now know how to proceed wit this...

Thank you for reading



Submitted October 30, 2020 at 11:30PM

So thats thestory (24M). I love(d) a girl (23F), which I met about 1.5yrs ago. We instantly connected and spend a lot of time together. Basically, I was extremely happy, looked forward to see her and to do stuff together, which is otherwise unlikely for me, because even though I would say that it is rather easy for me to connect with people, I also get easily bored, need plenty time for myself alone, and struggle to keep platonic relationships up for a long time. So I have a lot of vague friends, but basically no really close ones I would trust or open myself to. To continue the story I confessed my feelings to her after a few weeks and got "soft-rejected" the first time -speaking she said she is still into her ex. So we first stayed friends and after I felt she was open to something I tried again, but got actually real rejected - as she said we can still be "good friends", but we never recovered.It was akward for a bit, but as I see her at work the relationship got better with time, but it never really healed - nobody really texts each other and we just have friendly conversations / time toghether because of work. I try to distance myself, but still have really strong feeling even after a whole year. I feel jelousy, sadness, and emptiness and she pretty much is aware of my feelings, thus I also cannot blame her for anything as I also would not want to hang out with me under this circumstances . I would really like to hang out, but I will also know that I get attached and hurt myself in the end. I am angry at myself for ruining the best friendship I had. I think it would have been benefitial to talk it out, but she really blocked of my attempts to do so - thus I gave up and now I just do now know how to proceed wit this...Thank you for reading
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