Should I (26F) wait until I lose weight to start dating again?

Over the past year I’ve gained 30 lbs. Prior to gaining the weight, I had lost 30 lbs. so I just effectively gained all of the weight back. I think it was a combination of 1. Starting an SSRI 2. A bad break up 3. Starting and losing a few jobs 4. Starting university 5. And generally not making an effort to eat healthily.

I’m not happy with my body and I’m not confident at all. I don’t think I’d feel comfortable dating at the size I am right now. But I also feel like if I don’t date, then I can just keep putting off losing weight. Almost as if I won’t really have a good enough reason to lose the weight. I also feel like I’m running out of time.

So I’m stuck. Between attempting to start dating now, waiting until I reach my goal weight, or waiting until I’m far enough along that I’m confident in my weight loss. I just know that I’ll keep making excuses not to start or giving up if I don’t have a goal in mind.

Is there anyone out there who is in or has been in my situation?



Submitted August 08, 2020 at 12:12AM

Over the past year I’ve gained 30 lbs. Prior to gaining the weight, I had lost 30 lbs. so I just effectively gained all of the weight back. I think it was a combination of 1. Starting an SSRI 2. A bad break up 3. Starting and losing a few jobs 4. Starting university 5. And generally not making an effort to eat healthily.I’m not happy with my body and I’m not confident at all. I don’t think I’d feel comfortable dating at the size I am right now. But I also feel like if I don’t date, then I can just keep putting off losing weight. Almost as if I won’t really have a good enough reason to lose the weight. I also feel like I’m running out of time.So I’m stuck. Between attempting to start dating now, waiting until I reach my goal weight, or waiting until I’m far enough along that I’m confident in my weight loss. I just know that I’ll keep making excuses not to start or giving up if I don’t have a goal in mind.Is there anyone out there who is in or has been in my situation?

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