Can two submissive leaning people work?

Every time I've asked my bf a fantasy of his, it's always something about me being dominant. Not like whips and chains, but me being on top, taking charge, etc. But I'm more naturally submissive. It doesn't turn me on to be dominant at all.

I prefer men to tend to take charge sexually, but he's much more passive. One time when we were engaged in foreplay, he even asked me, "what do you want me to do?" That's honestly one of the biggest turn offs to me, when a guy asks for instructions even when he knows the things I like. It makes me want to just roll over and turn on the tv.

It makes getting turned on for me difficult. It doesn't help that his dick is huge; I REALLY need to be wet for him to even get in. Once we get going, we have great sex even though he doesn't do a lot of the things I like. It's getting turned on that takes work. I've told him clearly what I want but he just barely does those things. I even reminded him recently that I like the idea of being tied up but he told me "that sounds rapey."

I don't want him to do anything he's not up for, but I feel frustrated. He's frustrated too, but doesn't seem to connect the dots that the reason I don't get as wet or want sex as often as I could or should is because he doesn't do the things I like and he's not naturally more dominant. He can be very passive about sex, but also expects to get laid a lot.

Do ya'll think it can work? Does anyone have any advice about this?



Submitted May 07, 2020 at 12:27AM

Every time I've asked my bf a fantasy of his, it's always something about me being dominant. Not like whips and chains, but me being on top, taking charge, etc. But I'm more naturally submissive. It doesn't turn me on to be dominant at all.I prefer men to tend to take charge sexually, but he's much more passive. One time when we were engaged in foreplay, he even asked me, "what do you want me to do?" That's honestly one of the biggest turn offs to me, when a guy asks for instructions even when he knows the things I like. It makes me want to just roll over and turn on the tv.It makes getting turned on for me difficult. It doesn't help that his dick is huge; I REALLY need to be wet for him to even get in. Once we get going, we have great sex even though he doesn't do a lot of the things I like. It's getting turned on that takes work. I've told him clearly what I want but he just barely does those things. I even reminded him recently that I like the idea of being tied up but he told me "that sounds rapey."I don't want him to do anything he's not up for, but I feel frustrated. He's frustrated too, but doesn't seem to connect the dots that the reason I don't get as wet or want sex as often as I could or should is because he doesn't do the things I like and he's not naturally more dominant. He can be very passive about sex, but also expects to get laid a lot.Do ya'll think it can work? Does anyone have any advice about this?
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