Is BF controlling when it comes to alcohol?

Hello, I (F just turned 21 Oct 2019) feel like I may have disappointed my boyfriend of 1 yr and a couple of months because I got slightly tipsy one time.

Background: As mentioned above, I recently turned 21 and now I’m legally able to drink. Prior to this, I was never really interested in drinking and I didn’t want to have any run ins with the law. I’ve only ever “drank” one time when I was 18-19yrs when sleeping over my friends house and it was only a sip of Jack Daniels.

Now, ever since my 21st (no I didn’t trashed on my bday lol), I’ve had about maybe 6 drinks total but they always had at LEAST 75% of the drink still there because i just hate the taste of alcohol and I never had more than just a couple of sips.

UNTIL I recently tried moscato with some friends that we both know (he wasn’t able to make it) and I really liked it. Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago, we hung out to eat and I had sangria. This was probably the most alcohol I’ve ever had and I got kind of tipsy and he sobered me up and whatnot before dropping me off at home. (He was very nice and took care of me and whatnot)

Now ever since then, I’ve kind of feel like I need to not drink either around him or I need his permission. And I am getting a little irritated towards the situation. Now although he’s never said “do not drink at all”, he’s always said “just don’t get drunk or tipsy” (which I understand if we are out in public, I don’t wanna be a nuisance to others) but I still feel the quiet expectation, the quiet rule of me not drinking anymore and it’s upsetting me that I feel “restrained” I guess, or that I “hold” myself back because of him or whenever I am around him.

Am I being unreasonable to feel this way? I’m not wanting to get black out drunk or trashed or even tipsy, it’s just since I didn’t drink before 21 like most people do, I would just like to explore and fill my curiosity. Is he controlling in this way? Sometimes I feel like yes and sometimes no. He is a great boyfriend, don’t get me wrong. Am I overreacting or is this like a “red flag”?

Sorry so long also this is my first post

TL;DR don’t normally drink, got tipsy once, feel this unspoken control-ness my bf has on me on the topic of alcohol



Submitted January 26, 2020 at 12:02AM

Hello, I (F just turned 21 Oct 2019) feel like I may have disappointed my boyfriend of 1 yr and a couple of months because I got slightly tipsy one time.Background: As mentioned above, I recently turned 21 and now I’m legally able to drink. Prior to this, I was never really interested in drinking and I didn’t want to have any run ins with the law. I’ve only ever “drank” one time when I was 18-19yrs when sleeping over my friends house and it was only a sip of Jack Daniels.Now, ever since my 21st (no I didn’t trashed on my bday lol), I’ve had about maybe 6 drinks total but they always had at LEAST 75% of the drink still there because i just hate the taste of alcohol and I never had more than just a couple of sips.UNTIL I recently tried moscato with some friends that we both know (he wasn’t able to make it) and I really liked it. Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago, we hung out to eat and I had sangria. This was probably the most alcohol I’ve ever had and I got kind of tipsy and he sobered me up and whatnot before dropping me off at home. (He was very nice and took care of me and whatnot)Now ever since then, I’ve kind of feel like I need to not drink either around him or I need his permission. And I am getting a little irritated towards the situation. Now although he’s never said “do not drink at all”, he’s always said “just don’t get drunk or tipsy” (which I understand if we are out in public, I don’t wanna be a nuisance to others) but I still feel the quiet expectation, the quiet rule of me not drinking anymore and it’s upsetting me that I feel “restrained” I guess, or that I “hold” myself back because of him or whenever I am around him.Am I being unreasonable to feel this way? I’m not wanting to get black out drunk or trashed or even tipsy, it’s just since I didn’t drink before 21 like most people do, I would just like to explore and fill my curiosity. Is he controlling in this way? Sometimes I feel like yes and sometimes no. He is a great boyfriend, don’t get me wrong. Am I overreacting or is this like a “red flag”?Sorry so long also this is my first postTL;DR don’t normally drink, got tipsy once, feel this unspoken control-ness my bf has on me on the topic of alcohol

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