Moving communication off-app

So I (33F) am on several dating apps and I frequently get asked to move communication off the app to text or something else (e.g., Snapchat, which I don't have or IG, which I barely use). I generally don't like to move off-app until after at least the first date. I talk to a lot of people in the apps and, statistically, I know that probably 90% of them I won't meet more than once irl (if we get that far), so frankly I just don't really feel like it's worth it to move to texting before I actually meet someone.

But it seems like people often are turned off/annoyed by this or see it as a sign of disinterest (I always say I'm happy to continue talking in-app). I don't really plan on changing my stance on this, but I am wondering what other people's opinions are about this issue and how you navigate it. Is it some kind of red flag if someone wants to keep communication to the app? If so, is there some way to alleviate those concerns (other than moving off-app)?



Submitted November 02, 2020 at 11:50PM

So I (33F) am on several dating apps and I frequently get asked to move communication off the app to text or something else (e.g., Snapchat, which I don't have or IG, which I barely use). I generally don't like to move off-app until after at least the first date. I talk to a lot of people in the apps and, statistically, I know that probably 90% of them I won't meet more than once irl (if we get that far), so frankly I just don't really feel like it's worth it to move to texting before I actually meet someone.But it seems like people often are turned off/annoyed by this or see it as a sign of disinterest (I always say I'm happy to continue talking in-app). I don't really plan on changing my stance on this, but I am wondering what other people's opinions are about this issue and how you navigate it. Is it some kind of red flag if someone wants to keep communication to the app? If so, is there some way to alleviate those concerns (other than moving off-app)?

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