[20M] Might get back with my [20F] ex, but I cheated while we were dating and she still doesn't know about.

My ex gf (of 4 years) and I broke up about a month or two ago and I have thought about it a lot and think that I want to get back together with her. She told me that she would be open to it so I'm not worried about that, but I cheated on her about a year and a half before we broke up and never had the balls to tell her.

I obviously felt terrible about the whole incident and knew that it would never happen again, as it was just a dumb drunken mistake. I was at a party and met a girl that was all over me. I ended up going back to her place and she gave me head. The next morning, and for the next few weeks, I felt awful about it and wasn't quiet sure how to handle it.

Long story short, I never ended up telling her and I broke up with her about a month or two ago because I felt that we were growing apart. She was very upset, but we ended on good terms. Recently I have been thinking I want to give it another try. But, I ended up telling a few of our mutual friends about the incident since we broke up and I'm sure if we were to get back together, she would find out eventually. I also think that for our relationship to work, it might be something I need to be open to her about.

So my question is: What should I do? Should I just get back together with her? Should I tell her before we get back together? or should I get back with her and then wait until the relationship is strong again to tell her? or something else?

TL;DR : Cheated on my girlfriend of 4 years and didn't tell her. Ended up breaking up with her a year+ later. Now thinking I want to get back with her, but don't know if I should tell her.



Submitted January 23, 2020 at 10:46PM

My ex gf (of 4 years) and I broke up about a month or two ago and I have thought about it a lot and think that I want to get back together with her. She told me that she would be open to it so I'm not worried about that, but I cheated on her about a year and a half before we broke up and never had the balls to tell her.I obviously felt terrible about the whole incident and knew that it would never happen again, as it was just a dumb drunken mistake. I was at a party and met a girl that was all over me. I ended up going back to her place and she gave me head. The next morning, and for the next few weeks, I felt awful about it and wasn't quiet sure how to handle it.Long story short, I never ended up telling her and I broke up with her about a month or two ago because I felt that we were growing apart. She was very upset, but we ended on good terms. Recently I have been thinking I want to give it another try. But, I ended up telling a few of our mutual friends about the incident since we broke up and I'm sure if we were to get back together, she would find out eventually. I also think that for our relationship to work, it might be something I need to be open to her about.So my question is: What should I do? Should I just get back together with her? Should I tell her before we get back together? or should I get back with her and then wait until the relationship is strong again to tell her? or something else?TL;DR : Cheated on my girlfriend of 4 years and didn't tell her. Ended up breaking up with her a year+ later. Now thinking I want to get back with her, but don't know if I should tell her.
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