Elder brother (42M) cheated on his wife (43F) of 15 years. What can I do to support her?

Throwaway for obvious reasons. I'll try to make it short and simple

Today my elder brother called me and said he is breaking up with his wife because he's "found a soulmate". He packed his things and moved to his loved, with whom he's been together since June.

I was so shocked because their marriage seemed perfect. Like absolutely perfect. No scandals, no big issues, nothing. They've been married for 15 years. They have a daughter who's 6 now, they wanted her very much. His wife is like a sister to me. So I couldn't believe it and thought it's all a bad timed April Fool's joke.

I called her immediately afterward to support her. She confided in me and told me everything he said today. So, apparently, he was unhappy for these whole 15 years. And (I cannot believe he means it) he never wanted his daughter. He said that their daughter was a mistake and was his wife's whim. He said he was absolutely sure his wife stopped loving him like a couple of years ago and so now he's decided to be happy. And if she truly loves him, she should let him go... All of this after seeming like a role model husband and father. My niece loves him so. I talked to her too, and she said she's sad that Daddy is on a business trip again... While Daddy is perfectly happy fucking his "soulmate".

I never expected my brother to be an ignorant infantile narcissist. I want to support my sister-in-law and so I ask for your advice. How can I help her get through this terrible time? What should I say? What topics to avoid? Thanks in advance.

TL;DR: My elder brother has a side affair and cheats on his wife of 15 years, I want to help her.



Submitted September 17, 2019 at 11:57PM

Throwaway for obvious reasons. I'll try to make it short and simpleToday my elder brother called me and said he is breaking up with his wife because he's "found a soulmate". He packed his things and moved to his loved, with whom he's been together since June.I was so shocked because their marriage seemed perfect. Like absolutely perfect. No scandals, no big issues, nothing. They've been married for 15 years. They have a daughter who's 6 now, they wanted her very much. His wife is like a sister to me. So I couldn't believe it and thought it's all a bad timed April Fool's joke.I called her immediately afterward to support her. She confided in me and told me everything he said today. So, apparently, he was unhappy for these whole 15 years. And (I cannot believe he means it) he never wanted his daughter. He said that their daughter was a mistake and was his wife's whim. He said he was absolutely sure his wife stopped loving him like a couple of years ago and so now he's decided to be happy. And if she truly loves him, she should let him go... All of this after seeming like a role model husband and father. My niece loves him so. I talked to her too, and she said she's sad that Daddy is on a business trip again... While Daddy is perfectly happy fucking his "soulmate".I never expected my brother to be an ignorant infantile narcissist. I want to support my sister-in-law and so I ask for your advice. How can I help her get through this terrible time? What should I say? What topics to avoid? Thanks in advance.TL;DR: My elder brother has a side affair and cheats on his wife of 15 years, I want to help her.
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