My (23f) best friend (23f) shouted at me & walked out on me during an argument and left me by myself on the street

I guess I am in a bit of a sticky situation. So as the title suggests, she stormed off on me leaving me by myself instead of discussing our issue that we were having.

My best friend is leaving to go study at uni a few hours away and so she wanted to have a leaving dinner with all of her close friends. She basically asked me to go and I flat out refused because one of the girls who is going used to be a very close friend of mine & we had a massive falling out and haven’t reconciled since. I haven’t seen her since that fight. If I go, not only will it cause awkward tension between us and everyone around but my best friend will try to make us make amends (as she has attempted to before). This is something I am simply not ready for as this friend hurt me deeply. On top of that, I do not know any of her other friends & we simply do not vibe well adding to the tension which will basically put me into anxiety overdrive. She knows I am a person who would never willingly put myself in a situation that I am uncomfortable with as I get anxious very easily but I will always offer an alternative.

I told my friend that I would love to do a separate thing instead and we can celebrate together that way like we have always done. She completely switched on me and went off on one talking about how “it’s not about you, it’s about me” “this is the one thing I’m asking for” to which I replied “I’ve been there for you in other ways but I simply cannot do this” and she then said that I haven’t been there for her which stung like hell since I have always put so much effort into our friendship. She then shut the conversation down and said “you know what, we will stop the conversation here but let me tell you. You have pissed me off” and proceeded to storm off whilst I was trying to discuss it with her on our way home as we live close by to each other. I stopped dead in my tracks watching her walk away and decided to turn around and take another route home.

This one thing I am super uncomfortable with, I don’t understand why I feel like I am being forced to go. Side note: there is a close friend that I have that my best friend cannot stand and yet I have never brought them together. I have always hung out with them separately to keep the peace and to avoid any awkwardness/uncomfortableness. Why am I not shown that same sentiment?? Maybe I’m just wrong and I should have agreed? I don’t even know. All I know is that I’m hurt and I’ve already had such a depressing day due to work & getting rejected from a course I applied for only to be met with this. The personality that she has is “my way or the highway” and I always try to do what she wants and put in effort to enjoy stuff that she does but this one thing I just cannot bring myself to do and now it’s caused a massive falling out.

Was I wrong for refusing to go to her leaving dinner? What do I do about this situation as she’s never walked out on me that way.

Tl:dr best friend walked out on me during an argument as she wanted me to attend an event where a girl that she is close with is going. That girl is the same girl I had a huge falling out with. Was I wrong for refusing to go?



Submitted August 08, 2019 at 12:04AM

I guess I am in a bit of a sticky situation. So as the title suggests, she stormed off on me leaving me by myself instead of discussing our issue that we were having.My best friend is leaving to go study at uni a few hours away and so she wanted to have a leaving dinner with all of her close friends. She basically asked me to go and I flat out refused because one of the girls who is going used to be a very close friend of mine & we had a massive falling out and haven’t reconciled since. I haven’t seen her since that fight. If I go, not only will it cause awkward tension between us and everyone around but my best friend will try to make us make amends (as she has attempted to before). This is something I am simply not ready for as this friend hurt me deeply. On top of that, I do not know any of her other friends & we simply do not vibe well adding to the tension which will basically put me into anxiety overdrive. She knows I am a person who would never willingly put myself in a situation that I am uncomfortable with as I get anxious very easily but I will always offer an alternative.I told my friend that I would love to do a separate thing instead and we can celebrate together that way like we have always done. She completely switched on me and went off on one talking about how “it’s not about you, it’s about me” “this is the one thing I’m asking for” to which I replied “I’ve been there for you in other ways but I simply cannot do this” and she then said that I haven’t been there for her which stung like hell since I have always put so much effort into our friendship. She then shut the conversation down and said “you know what, we will stop the conversation here but let me tell you. You have pissed me off” and proceeded to storm off whilst I was trying to discuss it with her on our way home as we live close by to each other. I stopped dead in my tracks watching her walk away and decided to turn around and take another route home.This one thing I am super uncomfortable with, I don’t understand why I feel like I am being forced to go. Side note: there is a close friend that I have that my best friend cannot stand and yet I have never brought them together. I have always hung out with them separately to keep the peace and to avoid any awkwardness/uncomfortableness. Why am I not shown that same sentiment?? Maybe I’m just wrong and I should have agreed? I don’t even know. All I know is that I’m hurt and I’ve already had such a depressing day due to work & getting rejected from a course I applied for only to be met with this. The personality that she has is “my way or the highway” and I always try to do what she wants and put in effort to enjoy stuff that she does but this one thing I just cannot bring myself to do and now it’s caused a massive falling out.Was I wrong for refusing to go to her leaving dinner? What do I do about this situation as she’s never walked out on me that way.Tl:dr best friend walked out on me during an argument as she wanted me to attend an event where a girl that she is close with is going. That girl is the same girl I had a huge falling out with. Was I wrong for refusing to go?
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