My BF (30) won't let me touch his phone, not even to change the song

My BF and I (F25) have been together for four years now, we started off really happy, fun loving and explorative but now it feels we are stale. We barely have sex, and if we do he doesn't often finish, he just rolls over and turns out the light and falls asleep.

But for the past two years he's never allowed me to touch his phone. He won't let me use it to change the song if he's driving in the car, he'll do it himself. He takes it into the bathroom with him just to pee. I've NEVER gone through it, I've never threatened to go through it, it's never been something he should be worried about me doing it. But the more he's being protective of it, the more I'm suspicious.
He says he's protective of it because he's scarred from High School days of people posting silly status', but just typing that out it sounds like the dumbest lie. I've brought it up a few times, saying it's making me uncomfortable that he's so untrusting. He let go a litttttle bit, but he later admitted to me that he deletes all messages now (apart from ours) because he likes a neater phone (wtf?).

I'm so open with my phone, he's even read through my messages before and I just don't care, but when I said that's an imbalance of trust he just said that he'll never go through my phone again.
This is some pretty suss behaviour right? There's no way he could actually be worried I'm going to post a silly status on his facebook? I don't quite know how to go forward from here, it seems like a stupid thing to end a relationship over "we broke up because he wouldn't let me use his phone", but it feels indicative of something much more sinister.

Am I overreacting???

TL;DR my boyfriend won't let me touch his phone, deletes all his messages and it's making me suspicious

Submitted July 05, 2019 at 12:14AM

My BF and I (F25) have been together for four years now, we started off really happy, fun loving and explorative but now it feels we are stale. We barely have sex, and if we do he doesn't often finish, he just rolls over and turns out the light and falls asleep.But for the past two years he's never allowed me to touch his phone. He won't let me use it to change the song if he's driving in the car, he'll do it himself. He takes it into the bathroom with him just to pee. I've NEVER gone through it, I've never threatened to go through it, it's never been something he should be worried about me doing it. But the more he's being protective of it, the more I'm suspicious.He says he's protective of it because he's scarred from High School days of people posting silly status', but just typing that out it sounds like the dumbest lie. I've brought it up a few times, saying it's making me uncomfortable that he's so untrusting. He let go a litttttle bit, but he later admitted to me that he deletes all messages now (apart from ours) because he likes a neater phone (wtf?).I'm so open with my phone, he's even read through my messages before and I just don't care, but when I said that's an imbalance of trust he just said that he'll never go through my phone again.This is some pretty suss behaviour right? There's no way he could actually be worried I'm going to post a silly status on his facebook? I don't quite know how to go forward from here, it seems like a stupid thing to end a relationship over "we broke up because he wouldn't let me use his phone", but it feels indicative of something much more sinister.Am I overreacting???TL;DR my boyfriend won't let me touch his phone, deletes all his messages and it's making me suspicious