I look younger than I am and it's affecting my self-esteem when dating.

I'm a young adult, but people often tell me I look 15 or even as young as 12. There's been three separate occasions where middle school-aged boys talked to me in hopes of asking me out. (Fortunately, they got embarrassed and apologized when I told them I'm too old for them.) I've even had people, even close family members, tell me multiple times that any adult who'd want to date me would have to be some sort of creep. These comments have poisoned my self-image so much that I'm wary of guys my age who show interest in me. I feel unlovable in that sense.

Is there a way to rationalize myself out of this mindset? It sucks for my self-esteem, and I don't want to miss out on a potentially awesome partner because of my insecurities and paranoia.



Submitted August 30, 2021 at 12:14AM

I'm a young adult, but people often tell me I look 15 or even as young as 12. There's been three separate occasions where middle school-aged boys talked to me in hopes of asking me out. (Fortunately, they got embarrassed and apologized when I told them I'm too old for them.) I've even had people, even close family members, tell me multiple times that any adult who'd want to date me would have to be some sort of creep. These comments have poisoned my self-image so much that I'm wary of guys my age who show interest in me. I feel unlovable in that sense.Is there a way to rationalize myself out of this mindset? It sucks for my self-esteem, and I don't want to miss out on a potentially awesome partner because of my insecurities and paranoia.

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