how do I (20’sf) not follow my boyfriends (30’sm) diet while still being supportive?

Hey all,

Boyfriend has always struggled with his weight. I am someone who can eat whatever and stay thin. I actually eat quite healthy but I don’t limit myself or cut out certain foods, I just prioritize getting lots of nutrients. I also LOVE to cook foods from all over the world and like to make a dessert once a month or so. Boyfriends nutritionist recently put him on a diet that is essentially a keto/AIP diet, so, strict.

I do all of the cooking in our house, and so I’ve been making foods that fit his diet and just serving myself a side of rice or eating real pasta where he has zucchini noodles. My problem comes in more with making treats. Today I wanted to make peanut butter cookies, and he didn’t say anything but acted kind of like I was being unsupportive. I understand why he could feel this way, but I also don’t want to limit myself from eating the foods I like because he has to lose weight. If it were short term I wouldn’t mind, but this is meant to be a long term diet and I like the way I eat!

So friends, how does one support a partner in their weight loss journey when they themselves are not trying to lose weight and without having to totally change my own diet?

tl;dr: bf is trying to lose weight and I am not, how do I support him while still getting to eat how I want to?



Submitted April 11, 2020 at 12:00AM

Hey all,Boyfriend has always struggled with his weight. I am someone who can eat whatever and stay thin. I actually eat quite healthy but I don’t limit myself or cut out certain foods, I just prioritize getting lots of nutrients. I also LOVE to cook foods from all over the world and like to make a dessert once a month or so. Boyfriends nutritionist recently put him on a diet that is essentially a keto/AIP diet, so, strict.I do all of the cooking in our house, and so I’ve been making foods that fit his diet and just serving myself a side of rice or eating real pasta where he has zucchini noodles. My problem comes in more with making treats. Today I wanted to make peanut butter cookies, and he didn’t say anything but acted kind of like I was being unsupportive. I understand why he could feel this way, but I also don’t want to limit myself from eating the foods I like because he has to lose weight. If it were short term I wouldn’t mind, but this is meant to be a long term diet and I like the way I eat!So friends, how does one support a partner in their weight loss journey when they themselves are not trying to lose weight and without having to totally change my own diet?tl;dr: bf is trying to lose weight and I am not, how do I support him while still getting to eat how I want to?
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