Talked to him about Valentine’s Day. Ended up in an argument

Hi all

I (27F) am dating 34M.

He is heavily involved in AA/drug support groups. He’s currently helping a friend who almost OD’d 2 weeks ago.

Over the weekend I asked him what he was doing for Valentine’s Day. He responded “nothing” - I asked if he wanted to do anything, his response was no and that we would talk about it later. I didn’t expect this response and felt disrespected. I didn’t want to drop the subject so I harped on the issue and he finally told me why he didn’t want to do anything - apparently the friend he’s helping out is going thru suicidal thoughts from his separation/drugs and he wanted to keep the day open in case the friend needed him. I made a comment telling him I felt as if he’s putting the friend before me - and he lost his shit.

We have made up since then. We have been together for 6 months. I don’t want to push the issue and at this point, I have no plans for Valentine’s Day. Am I wrong for pushing the issue? He has cheated on me once - we have resolved that. I don’t know what to do, I can’t help but to think there’s someone else in the picture and that he’s just using this as an excuse. Input appreciated.



Submitted February 12, 2020 at 12:10AM

Hi allI (27F) am dating 34M.He is heavily involved in AA/drug support groups. He’s currently helping a friend who almost OD’d 2 weeks ago.Over the weekend I asked him what he was doing for Valentine’s Day. He responded “nothing” - I asked if he wanted to do anything, his response was no and that we would talk about it later. I didn’t expect this response and felt disrespected. I didn’t want to drop the subject so I harped on the issue and he finally told me why he didn’t want to do anything - apparently the friend he’s helping out is going thru suicidal thoughts from his separation/drugs and he wanted to keep the day open in case the friend needed him. I made a comment telling him I felt as if he’s putting the friend before me - and he lost his shit.We have made up since then. We have been together for 6 months. I don’t want to push the issue and at this point, I have no plans for Valentine’s Day. Am I wrong for pushing the issue? He has cheated on me once - we have resolved that. I don’t know what to do, I can’t help but to think there’s someone else in the picture and that he’s just using this as an excuse. Input appreciated.
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