What’s the REAL difference between girls that guys want to long term date vs the girls that guys just want to have sex with

So my friend (20f) and I (19f) where discussing some of our relationship woos. We both recently (and ironically) pretty much went through the same thing where the guys we had been talking to and going on amazing dates with, suddenly out of the blue admitted to not being ready for a serious relationship. My friend hasn’t ever had sex and she’s waiting till marriage. She tells guys this straight up before they even engage with her. I’m not a virgin, put I’ve been pretty serious about not sleeping with a guy unless I know it might be going somewhere serious.

I don’t mean to brag but, my friend and I are quit pretty. She models for a little town bouquet and has tons of Instagram followers and admirers while I recently got signed to an acting agency and have been recruited to be an “influencer” for brands on social media despite me not being very into it. My friend has had one serious relationship where the guy ended up cheating on her and going off to sleep with some other girl. She’s gone on tons of dates both with really great guys and other not so great guys. The same thing for me. Yet when we bring up seriousness in a relationship and looking for something more committed, guys run straight for the hills. And by that I mean, into some other girls arms. Who they seem to suddenly have no problem committing to.

I would say out of a lot of people our age, my friend and I pretty much know where we are going in life. Everything is almost 100% figured out. She’s about to be a senior with a degree in graphic design and I am about to be a junior working on my degree in Health Information Management. We know it’s not an appearance issue since we both workout and manage our weight (she’s a size 0/1 and I’m a size 2) and we are both focused on our education and success. My friend and I have been told that we are the kind of girls guys marry, so it seems like it shouldn’t be that hard to meet to date someone seriously.

We discuss our relationship problems every once in a while and one thing that we’ve seemed to notice is that even though we attract good and bad guys, the only thing they seem to be after is sex from us and not a committed/serious relationship. My friend is better than I am because she remains friends with these guys, but I cut them completely from my life once I realize I’m not going to get the relationship I want from them.

But after a while some of those same guys that have told us that they aren’t ready for a relationship or aren’t looking for something serious/long term are suddenly in a relationship and a very serious one at that - with some other girl. It’s honestly becoming a little irritating and at least for me, it’s starting to really piss me off. So what’s the real difference between the girls that guys want to date vs the girls that guys only want to fuck?

Submitted December 09, 2019 at 11:38PM

So my friend (20f) and I (19f) where discussing some of our relationship woos. We both recently (and ironically) pretty much went through the same thing where the guys we had been talking to and going on amazing dates with, suddenly out of the blue admitted to not being ready for a serious relationship. My friend hasn’t ever had sex and she’s waiting till marriage. She tells guys this straight up before they even engage with her. I’m not a virgin, put I’ve been pretty serious about not sleeping with a guy unless I know it might be going somewhere serious.I don’t mean to brag but, my friend and I are quit pretty. She models for a little town bouquet and has tons of Instagram followers and admirers while I recently got signed to an acting agency and have been recruited to be an “influencer” for brands on social media despite me not being very into it. My friend has had one serious relationship where the guy ended up cheating on her and going off to sleep with some other girl. She’s gone on tons of dates both with really great guys and other not so great guys. The same thing for me. Yet when we bring up seriousness in a relationship and looking for something more committed, guys run straight for the hills. And by that I mean, into some other girls arms. Who they seem to suddenly have no problem committing to.I would say out of a lot of people our age, my friend and I pretty much know where we are going in life. Everything is almost 100% figured out. She’s about to be a senior with a degree in graphic design and I am about to be a junior working on my degree in Health Information Management. We know it’s not an appearance issue since we both workout and manage our weight (she’s a size 0/1 and I’m a size 2) and we are both focused on our education and success. My friend and I have been told that we are the kind of girls guys marry, so it seems like it shouldn’t be that hard to meet to date someone seriously.We discuss our relationship problems every once in a while and one thing that we’ve seemed to notice is that even though we attract good and bad guys, the only thing they seem to be after is sex from us and not a committed/serious relationship. My friend is better than I am because she remains friends with these guys, but I cut them completely from my life once I realize I’m not going to get the relationship I want from them.But after a while some of those same guys that have told us that they aren’t ready for a relationship or aren’t looking for something serious/long term are suddenly in a relationship and a very serious one at that - with some other girl. It’s honestly becoming a little irritating and at least for me, it’s starting to really piss me off. So what’s the real difference between the girls that guys want to date vs the girls that guys only want to fuck?