I'm [21M] starting to feel like a dog to this girl [21F], is it justified?

Hey,

So, this is a long story which I will try to shorten up, otherwise I'd write a testament.

Went on a student's exchange, met a girl, felt chemistry, took her home the same day, asked her out, she agreed, we went out (both alone and in a group), we flirted and teased (sexually sometimes) I felt like something was up, tried for another meeting alone, got the meeting, she left me hanging, I got mad, I asked if she had a bf, she said she did, I spilled feelings on her (I had feelings by then and got pissed bc she hid her bf), we agreed to keep talking/meeting, we kept on talking/meeting, everytime we met (even in a group) we had a strong connection and sometimes separated from the group, we kept meeting, kept flirting/teasing, we kept meeting, I was getting confident, asked for a kiss, she said ''no tongue'', I didn't want a pity kiss, spilled feelings again, she said she had ''doubts'' and that it ''might work'', we kept talking. (this might not be totally accurate, it's a long story and I don't remember all the details/when it happened)

After that it was my last week there before I came home for Christmas. We met 4 times alone, even though she never met anyone else in a group. She texted me EVERYTIME after we met, only a few hours later. We kept on having tons of fun, we got closer, we started having a lot more physical contact (which didn't happen before). I was starting to get really confident that something would happen. I swear that I really thought something would happen. Before I left she said she would miss me and when I said I would miss her she said that that's what she wanted to hear. She texted me again, not soon after I left her. She was all sweet with me, sending hearts by text and that kind of stuff. She wanted to wait for me to get in my plane (5AM flight) to go to sleep but I told her not to.

Anyway, I told her I arrived well the next day and we kept talking. She kept flirting/teasing me and I felt honeypotted as fuck so I ended up asking her why she was doing this. She keeps saying that it's a thing she does with her ''friends'' but I don't believe she honeypots all her friends like this lol. I ended up spilling feelings again because this is frustrating and I said that I would do whatever it took for this thing to work between us. She said that the only thing she ever felt for me was some ''sexual tension'' and that she only though that I was ''funny and kind'' and nothing else. But the question is, if that's ALL that she felt for me, how could she have doubts about doing something with me considering she has a bf?

I guess we were both feeling bad about this situation and she said she needed time to ''heal'' from all this and wished me a Merry Christmas (it was like day 19 or 20 of December). I thought she was going to stop talking to me, but instead right after she said goodbye she basically left a picture of something she was doing.. Another conversation started. I've been talking to her everyday non-stop for as long as I can remember.

I know that she's been having some relationship issues. She's talked to me about it a few times, but she never explained what's going on, she just says that she has issues (also with long distance). She says she doesn't ''love'' her boyfriend, but that he just feels ''different from other guys''.

I'm still going back there and I will have some days to be with her. We already have some things that we want to do together. But the point of this is that I'm starting to feel like I'm replacing her boyfriend with all the talking/flirting/complimenting/teasing/dating/etc. but I'm not getting anything from her in return. I really wanted to try and make this work because I really like this girl for some reason, but at the same time I don't want to go back to her, treat her like a princess for a few more days, not getting anything in return and then sending her off to her bf.

I have to admit I fucked up a lot.. Spilling feelings, asking for a kiss when she has a bf, some bad shit I've said.. But she fucked up too. She says she forgives me and I forgive her too, but now it's starting to get annoying. But I don't know what to do anymore. Should I just be honest and tell her that I'm feeling like I'm replacing her bf? Should I keep talking to her, give her a good time when I go back and hope for the best?

Submitted December 27, 2019 at 12:16AM

Hey,So, this is a long story which I will try to shorten up, otherwise I'd write a testament.Went on a student's exchange, met a girl, felt chemistry, took her home the same day, asked her out, she agreed, we went out (both alone and in a group), we flirted and teased (sexually sometimes) I felt like something was up, tried for another meeting alone, got the meeting, she left me hanging, I got mad, I asked if she had a bf, she said she did, I spilled feelings on her (I had feelings by then and got pissed bc she hid her bf), we agreed to keep talking/meeting, we kept on talking/meeting, everytime we met (even in a group) we had a strong connection and sometimes separated from the group, we kept meeting, kept flirting/teasing, we kept meeting, I was getting confident, asked for a kiss, she said ''no tongue'', I didn't want a pity kiss, spilled feelings again, she said she had ''doubts'' and that it ''might work'', we kept talking. (this might not be totally accurate, it's a long story and I don't remember all the details/when it happened)After that it was my last week there before I came home for Christmas. We met 4 times alone, even though she never met anyone else in a group. She texted me EVERYTIME after we met, only a few hours later. We kept on having tons of fun, we got closer, we started having a lot more physical contact (which didn't happen before). I was starting to get really confident that something would happen. I swear that I really thought something would happen. Before I left she said she would miss me and when I said I would miss her she said that that's what she wanted to hear. She texted me again, not soon after I left her. She was all sweet with me, sending hearts by text and that kind of stuff. She wanted to wait for me to get in my plane (5AM flight) to go to sleep but I told her not to.Anyway, I told her I arrived well the next day and we kept talking. She kept flirting/teasing me and I felt honeypotted as fuck so I ended up asking her why she was doing this. She keeps saying that it's a thing she does with her ''friends'' but I don't believe she honeypots all her friends like this lol. I ended up spilling feelings again because this is frustrating and I said that I would do whatever it took for this thing to work between us. She said that the only thing she ever felt for me was some ''sexual tension'' and that she only though that I was ''funny and kind'' and nothing else. But the question is, if that's ALL that she felt for me, how could she have doubts about doing something with me considering she has a bf?I guess we were both feeling bad about this situation and she said she needed time to ''heal'' from all this and wished me a Merry Christmas (it was like day 19 or 20 of December). I thought she was going to stop talking to me, but instead right after she said goodbye she basically left a picture of something she was doing.. Another conversation started. I've been talking to her everyday non-stop for as long as I can remember.I know that she's been having some relationship issues. She's talked to me about it a few times, but she never explained what's going on, she just says that she has issues (also with long distance). She says she doesn't ''love'' her boyfriend, but that he just feels ''different from other guys''.I'm still going back there and I will have some days to be with her. We already have some things that we want to do together. But the point of this is that I'm starting to feel like I'm replacing her boyfriend with all the talking/flirting/complimenting/teasing/dating/etc. but I'm not getting anything from her in return. I really wanted to try and make this work because I really like this girl for some reason, but at the same time I don't want to go back to her, treat her like a princess for a few more days, not getting anything in return and then sending her off to her bf.I have to admit I fucked up a lot.. Spilling feelings, asking for a kiss when she has a bf, some bad shit I've said.. But she fucked up too. She says she forgives me and I forgive her too, but now it's starting to get annoying. But I don't know what to do anymore. Should I just be honest and tell her that I'm feeling like I'm replacing her bf? Should I keep talking to her, give her a good time when I go back and hope for the best?