I [22M] don't want to be friends with my crush [21M] anymore

I've been friends with this guy I met on a dating site for about six months. Since I met him, I've have one of those awful obsessive crushes on him, even though he told me pretty early on that he just wanted to be friends. A few weeks ago he got a boyfriend and hasn't been in contact quite as much and we haven't hung out in person in a couple weeks, so I'm not sure he wants to even be friends either (I've been getting mixed signals so maybe he's just been busy and/or too high to reach out? Hard to tell). Either way, it really hurts to be friends with him and I want to move on.

What should I do? I want to stop following his social media and turn down any future offers to hang out so I can let go, but I'm not sure what to say or whether I should say anything at all. Should I be honest and say why I'm unfollowing him or tell him something vague or should I just wait for a while and hope we sort of fade from each other's lives and then unfriend/unfollow him on social media sites? If he's not interested in being friends maybe he won't even notice... I just can't look at this objectively and I don't know what to do.

TL;DR: It hurts to be friends with my crush and I'm not sure what to do.



Submitted September 28, 2019 at 12:04AM

I've been friends with this guy I met on a dating site for about six months. Since I met him, I've have one of those awful obsessive crushes on him, even though he told me pretty early on that he just wanted to be friends. A few weeks ago he got a boyfriend and hasn't been in contact quite as much and we haven't hung out in person in a couple weeks, so I'm not sure he wants to even be friends either (I've been getting mixed signals so maybe he's just been busy and/or too high to reach out? Hard to tell). Either way, it really hurts to be friends with him and I want to move on.What should I do? I want to stop following his social media and turn down any future offers to hang out so I can let go, but I'm not sure what to say or whether I should say anything at all. Should I be honest and say why I'm unfollowing him or tell him something vague or should I just wait for a while and hope we sort of fade from each other's lives and then unfriend/unfollow him on social media sites? If he's not interested in being friends maybe he won't even notice... I just can't look at this objectively and I don't know what to do.TL;DR: It hurts to be friends with my crush and I'm not sure what to do.
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