How can I tell if my (35f) boyfriend (37m) is private or lying?

Tldr: Is my boyfriend private or is he a liar? If he really is just private what should I do?

Second account to protect privacy.

My boyfriend is super private, as he calls it. He doesnt like to be monitored and cherishes his freedom. He talks to a lot of women on social media, younger ones, but doesnt tell me. I've asked him to let me know who his female friends are, and when he talks to them if he does often. He refuses to. He does not want me to tag him on things on social media. He is always on his phone and actually doesnt here me when we talk bc he is talking to others. He gets mad if I ask who hes talking to.

He tells me I should just trust hin and that I cause arguments.

I get upset because social media clearly shows what photos he likes on Instagram and who hes chatting with on FB theough suggested people to chat with. It isnt hard to figure out. I get evey worried and ask him for reassurance about certain people he likes every photo of or people Facebook shows me he is chatting with.

He recently turned his active status off and also made it so people can only see mutual friends. He also asked his parents to do the same. I know that bc they all did it at once.

Is this guy private or a liar? I really cant tell. Why would he ask his parents to do this too? None of this feels right. I want an open relationship. If he really is just "private" I'm blowing it. But how the heck do you build trust in a situation like that?



Submitted September 29, 2019 at 11:38PM

Tldr: Is my boyfriend private or is he a liar? If he really is just private what should I do?Second account to protect privacy.My boyfriend is super private, as he calls it. He doesnt like to be monitored and cherishes his freedom. He talks to a lot of women on social media, younger ones, but doesnt tell me. I've asked him to let me know who his female friends are, and when he talks to them if he does often. He refuses to. He does not want me to tag him on things on social media. He is always on his phone and actually doesnt here me when we talk bc he is talking to others. He gets mad if I ask who hes talking to.He tells me I should just trust hin and that I cause arguments.I get upset because social media clearly shows what photos he likes on Instagram and who hes chatting with on FB theough suggested people to chat with. It isnt hard to figure out. I get evey worried and ask him for reassurance about certain people he likes every photo of or people Facebook shows me he is chatting with.He recently turned his active status off and also made it so people can only see mutual friends. He also asked his parents to do the same. I know that bc they all did it at once.Is this guy private or a liar? I really cant tell. Why would he ask his parents to do this too? None of this feels right. I want an open relationship. If he really is just "private" I'm blowing it. But how the heck do you build trust in a situation like that?
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