Finally unfriended this guy I’ve liked for a long time that is not interested in seriously dating me, as well as blocked his number.

No I am not mad at him.

I am going through a period of serious emotional growth and a “glow up” in a sense. I’ve known this guy for five years and when we first met we ended up hooking up a few weeks later. I honestly really did like this guy a lot. He is cute, a gentleman, charming, has his shit together, and likes a lot of the same things as me. We hung out a few more times but never hooked up again.

I made it clear I was interested in dating him but he told me he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend at the time. Years have passed and we’ve been friends on social media the whole time. He’s had a way to contact me the whole time. He’s had my number the whole time.

Two weeks ago we hung out again after he offered to take me out for drinks and dancing. We had a great time but did not hook up. He never tried to and I had no interest in that, since I am not interested in sleeping with people I am not exclusive with anymore. What really opened my eyes was when at one point during the night we somehow got on the topic of dating people with kids. I said I was not interested in dating people with kids. He said “well five years from now if you’re still single, we’ll see how you feel then. I used to feel that way too.”

That is when it occurred to me that I was honestly wasting my time. He had no intention of ever dating me seriously, and was simply hanging out with me when he was bored. That is perfectly fine if he just wants to be friends, it’s his right. However, he and I both know I have deeper feelings for him. So for me, hanging out with him only makes me frustrated mentally.

Fast forward to when I joined bumble a few days ago. He came across my profile and swiped right on me. When I saw him in my beeline notifications I got excited for a split second. I sent him a friendly message that said “you look familiar”. I immediately regretted it and came to my senses. I realized he was just acknowledging the fact that we both know each other in real life. He did not actually want to talk to me and would probably ignore my message. I also looked at his profile under the section where it lists what type of relationship you are looking for. His said “something casual”.

I unmatched him, blocked his number out of my phone, and deleted him out of my Snapchat friends. It is doing nothing for me to have contact with him knowing that I am romantically attracted to him and he does not feel the same way. I want to emphasize the fact that this guy has not done anything wrong. He was honest about his feelings from the beginning and said he didn’t not want a girlfriend. However, i am posting this as a wake up call to all the other women on this subreddit.

I am positive that most women do this exact same thing I did - keep a certain guy close by hoping one day when he’s tired of casual flings he will suddenly wake up and realize you are the one. It’s not going to happen. It’s embarrassing and they can sense your desperation. Get rid of all forms of contact with those men and move on. Focus your energy on the new people you could meet and stop waiting on a guy to suddenly decide you’re it.

Submitted August 12, 2019 at 11:31PM

No I am not mad at him.I am going through a period of serious emotional growth and a “glow up” in a sense. I’ve known this guy for five years and when we first met we ended up hooking up a few weeks later. I honestly really did like this guy a lot. He is cute, a gentleman, charming, has his shit together, and likes a lot of the same things as me. We hung out a few more times but never hooked up again.I made it clear I was interested in dating him but he told me he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend at the time. Years have passed and we’ve been friends on social media the whole time. He’s had a way to contact me the whole time. He’s had my number the whole time.Two weeks ago we hung out again after he offered to take me out for drinks and dancing. We had a great time but did not hook up. He never tried to and I had no interest in that, since I am not interested in sleeping with people I am not exclusive with anymore. What really opened my eyes was when at one point during the night we somehow got on the topic of dating people with kids. I said I was not interested in dating people with kids. He said “well five years from now if you’re still single, we’ll see how you feel then. I used to feel that way too.”That is when it occurred to me that I was honestly wasting my time. He had no intention of ever dating me seriously, and was simply hanging out with me when he was bored. That is perfectly fine if he just wants to be friends, it’s his right. However, he and I both know I have deeper feelings for him. So for me, hanging out with him only makes me frustrated mentally.Fast forward to when I joined bumble a few days ago. He came across my profile and swiped right on me. When I saw him in my beeline notifications I got excited for a split second. I sent him a friendly message that said “you look familiar”. I immediately regretted it and came to my senses. I realized he was just acknowledging the fact that we both know each other in real life. He did not actually want to talk to me and would probably ignore my message. I also looked at his profile under the section where it lists what type of relationship you are looking for. His said “something casual”.I unmatched him, blocked his number out of my phone, and deleted him out of my Snapchat friends. It is doing nothing for me to have contact with him knowing that I am romantically attracted to him and he does not feel the same way. I want to emphasize the fact that this guy has not done anything wrong. He was honest about his feelings from the beginning and said he didn’t not want a girlfriend. However, i am posting this as a wake up call to all the other women on this subreddit.I am positive that most women do this exact same thing I did - keep a certain guy close by hoping one day when he’s tired of casual flings he will suddenly wake up and realize you are the one. It’s not going to happen. It’s embarrassing and they can sense your desperation. Get rid of all forms of contact with those men and move on. Focus your energy on the new people you could meet and stop waiting on a guy to suddenly decide you’re it.