If I think I would be settling no matter what happens is it better if I give up on dating and accept being alone?

Im a 26 year old guy who has never been in a relationship or gone beyond making out with a woman and going on dates. I have had multiple women walk all over me, lead me on, use me for attention, and make me their back up guy. The worst experience was a woman I really cared about who I went on a few dates with and thought she would end up being my girlfriend played so many games with me, had many red flags, and would end things between us without saying why and then come back to me. Eventually I realized this was never going to work out and I had to just give up on that so I tried to stay her friend like she wanted and stopped giving her so much attention.

She hated it, would interrupt me if I talked to the group if friends we had which is what she would do when women tried to talk to me before we started going out on dates, and she flirted with a guy in the group in front of me. She had randomly denied feelings for him when we were seeing each other and by this point he randomly denied feelings for her. Well a few months later they started dating and they lasted through the rest of college together and made it to about 2 years together. They were inseparable and always all over each other on campus.

It all broke me, I couldnt even get another date for the rest of college. I have been on a few dates since then but my last date was two years ago. It never worked out with those women and after them and all this time I never recovered. I have no confidence and feel worthless. All I have are women who walked all over me and treated me like garbage, seeing the woman I cared about most with a guy I trusted as a friend, and all this loneliness.

I never got to have the college experience, I never got to date around and have fun, I never got to be in a relationship that lasted years or even a relationship at all, I never got to be a womans first anything. And now none of that can ever happen. I cant go back in time and be with her, or be good enough for her, or have a relationship like theirs in college or be with a college woman. I can never be a womans first anything or have a meaningful relationship.

I cant even meet women as it is but it truly feels like if I ever meet anyone I will just be settling. I compare all women to the woman I cared about, and none not even models compare to her and trust me she isnt a model. I dont think any woman I could meet now will ever make me happy or be good enough to me, she won't ever be her and none of them will ever make up for what I missed out on or been through. Not to mention I will always be a worthless joke because thats how those women treated me.

And none of this even matters now, by my age people have been a relationship and/or hooked up with someone or a few people. Ive been made fun and looked down on by women I considered friends who were women for being single and inexperienced and that was years ago, I must seem even worse now. Ive been told Im the guy women settle for in their 40s, not have fun with and want in their 20s. After all this time, effort, everything Ive been through and missed out on just to maybe get a chance years from now, it wont even be worth it. I truly hate myself, I am a pathetic, worthless, joke, just like those women saw me as, and I dont think theres a point in even trying to date ever again.

Submitted October 18, 2021 at 01:05AM

Im a 26 year old guy who has never been in a relationship or gone beyond making out with a woman and going on dates. I have had multiple women walk all over me, lead me on, use me for attention, and make me their back up guy. The worst experience was a woman I really cared about who I went on a few dates with and thought she would end up being my girlfriend played so many games with me, had many red flags, and would end things between us without saying why and then come back to me. Eventually I realized this was never going to work out and I had to just give up on that so I tried to stay her friend like she wanted and stopped giving her so much attention.She hated it, would interrupt me if I talked to the group if friends we had which is what she would do when women tried to talk to me before we started going out on dates, and she flirted with a guy in the group in front of me. She had randomly denied feelings for him when we were seeing each other and by this point he randomly denied feelings for her. Well a few months later they started dating and they lasted through the rest of college together and made it to about 2 years together. They were inseparable and always all over each other on campus.It all broke me, I couldnt even get another date for the rest of college. I have been on a few dates since then but my last date was two years ago. It never worked out with those women and after them and all this time I never recovered. I have no confidence and feel worthless. All I have are women who walked all over me and treated me like garbage, seeing the woman I cared about most with a guy I trusted as a friend, and all this loneliness.I never got to have the college experience, I never got to date around and have fun, I never got to be in a relationship that lasted years or even a relationship at all, I never got to be a womans first anything. And now none of that can ever happen. I cant go back in time and be with her, or be good enough for her, or have a relationship like theirs in college or be with a college woman. I can never be a womans first anything or have a meaningful relationship.I cant even meet women as it is but it truly feels like if I ever meet anyone I will just be settling. I compare all women to the woman I cared about, and none not even models compare to her and trust me she isnt a model. I dont think any woman I could meet now will ever make me happy or be good enough to me, she won't ever be her and none of them will ever make up for what I missed out on or been through. Not to mention I will always be a worthless joke because thats how those women treated me.And none of this even matters now, by my age people have been a relationship and/or hooked up with someone or a few people. Ive been made fun and looked down on by women I considered friends who were women for being single and inexperienced and that was years ago, I must seem even worse now. Ive been told Im the guy women settle for in their 40s, not have fun with and want in their 20s. After all this time, effort, everything Ive been through and missed out on just to maybe get a chance years from now, it wont even be worth it. I truly hate myself, I am a pathetic, worthless, joke, just like those women saw me as, and I dont think theres a point in even trying to date ever again.