Trying to decide if I should tell my [27m] friend[25f] that I want to try being more than friends. We met on Tinder a year ago.

Honestly, reading this back, I sound like a giant simp/loser. But here it goes.

So for a bit of backstory, we met on a Tinder date a year ago. It was a very pleasant evening, but I couldn't tell if she was into me or not, so I decided to not make a move. Since then we have done a lot of things together, concerts, gotten food, gone into the city, hung out at her place for video games/movies and we've gotten pretty close. We would talk about our dating experiences with other people and for most of last year, we were seeing other people.

I stopped seeing someone in January and haven't been with anybody since, so admittedly I've gotten pretty lonely. In February, my friend and I went to a concert together and I started to seriously think about asking if she wanted to try anything beyond friendship (hookup, FWB or even dating) I was about to ask her at the show until a guy came up, started talking to her and she ended up leaving to go hang out with him. She asked if I was okay with her going to hang out with him, and I didn't want to cockblock and make things weird so I just told her it's fine.

Right before quarantine, I hung out with her at her new apartment. She made an off-hand comment about how I was the only guy from Tinder that she'd never hooked up with, which I thought was weird but I couldn't really act on it because another person was coming over to the apartment shortly after to hang out with us. She has also told me how she has friends that she's hooked up with and is still friends with.

Since the quarantine has happened, we have talked almost everyday. We video chat and play games that go for a couple hours. This weekend, we both took the risk to hang out at her place (we both have been self isolating for a while, so we think we were in the clear) The plan was to watch a scary movie at her place and I could crash on her couch. I came over with some beer and thinking that I might make a move.

When I got there, she had smoked quite a bit of weed (we both smoke so this is no problem) but I didn't want to try anything if she was super high. I don't know if it's worth mentioning, but she looked really good. She was wearing a loose crop top and very short cutoff jean shorts. We sat on the couch listening to music from her laptop and I made it a point to sit pretty close to her, to see how she'd respond. Our thighs were pretty much touching, but she was eating dinner so I felt it wasn't time to make a move. When she finished, she got up, put her stuff in the kitchen then came back with more snacks, but she put them in between her and I, effectively separating us.

We were gonna watch a horror movie. I was hoping this would be a good opportunity to cuddle, but when the movie started, she went down to the floor to play with her cat, and when she was done, she got up and sat on a recliner on the other side of the room... and it seemed like she was texting some Tinder guys.

So here's the thing, I don't know if she was giving me subtle rejection cues or if she was just completely oblivious. Granted I didn't really MAKE any move, so it's possible she didn't think anything of it, because she still messages and video chats with me every day since. I just... I'm really starting to like her but I'm worried of the friendship being ruined.

My question is... what should I do, and if I should tell her, what do I say and when's the best time to say it?

Submitted May 21, 2020 at 12:06AM

Honestly, reading this back, I sound like a giant simp/loser. But here it goes.So for a bit of backstory, we met on a Tinder date a year ago. It was a very pleasant evening, but I couldn't tell if she was into me or not, so I decided to not make a move. Since then we have done a lot of things together, concerts, gotten food, gone into the city, hung out at her place for video games/movies and we've gotten pretty close. We would talk about our dating experiences with other people and for most of last year, we were seeing other people.I stopped seeing someone in January and haven't been with anybody since, so admittedly I've gotten pretty lonely. In February, my friend and I went to a concert together and I started to seriously think about asking if she wanted to try anything beyond friendship (hookup, FWB or even dating) I was about to ask her at the show until a guy came up, started talking to her and she ended up leaving to go hang out with him. She asked if I was okay with her going to hang out with him, and I didn't want to cockblock and make things weird so I just told her it's fine.Right before quarantine, I hung out with her at her new apartment. She made an off-hand comment about how I was the only guy from Tinder that she'd never hooked up with, which I thought was weird but I couldn't really act on it because another person was coming over to the apartment shortly after to hang out with us. She has also told me how she has friends that she's hooked up with and is still friends with.Since the quarantine has happened, we have talked almost everyday. We video chat and play games that go for a couple hours. This weekend, we both took the risk to hang out at her place (we both have been self isolating for a while, so we think we were in the clear) The plan was to watch a scary movie at her place and I could crash on her couch. I came over with some beer and thinking that I might make a move.When I got there, she had smoked quite a bit of weed (we both smoke so this is no problem) but I didn't want to try anything if she was super high. I don't know if it's worth mentioning, but she looked really good. She was wearing a loose crop top and very short cutoff jean shorts. We sat on the couch listening to music from her laptop and I made it a point to sit pretty close to her, to see how she'd respond. Our thighs were pretty much touching, but she was eating dinner so I felt it wasn't time to make a move. When she finished, she got up, put her stuff in the kitchen then came back with more snacks, but she put them in between her and I, effectively separating us.We were gonna watch a horror movie. I was hoping this would be a good opportunity to cuddle, but when the movie started, she went down to the floor to play with her cat, and when she was done, she got up and sat on a recliner on the other side of the room... and it seemed like she was texting some Tinder guys.So here's the thing, I don't know if she was giving me subtle rejection cues or if she was just completely oblivious. Granted I didn't really MAKE any move, so it's possible she didn't think anything of it, because she still messages and video chats with me every day since. I just... I'm really starting to like her but I'm worried of the friendship being ruined.My question is... what should I do, and if I should tell her, what do I say and when's the best time to say it?