My [F22] boyfriend’s [M22] mother [F40] has his banking information and regularly takes money out of his account. He has no savings because of her

Anything he puts in she will spend half or more. She is a good woman in a lot of ways who has raised kind intelligent children as a single mother but her entitlement and willingness to hold her son down baffles me. She has not had a job in the 10 years I’ve known her, her youngest kids are now 10 and 12.

My boyfriend are servers at a restaurant and are out of work for the foreseeable future. I have enough saved to cover my half of the rent but he does not, not because he is a frivolous spender but because she spends his money to support her household. He shuts down when I ask him about this issue because he feels a lot of guilt about how she suffered raising him. He also feels obligated to care for his younger siblings.

Oh and he also makes $200+ a month in car payments for his car, which he bought for himself but which his mom has had at her place 25 minutes away for the past 8 months. She calls it “my car”

This is a serious issue with me now and I really want to say something about it but we’re about to be quarantined together so I don’t know. It seems really fucked up and I don’t understand why he lets her take advantage of him to such a huge extent

tldr; my boyfriend gives his unemployed single mother whatever she wants, even though it hurts him financially

Submitted March 17, 2020 at 12:12AM

Anything he puts in she will spend half or more. She is a good woman in a lot of ways who has raised kind intelligent children as a single mother but her entitlement and willingness to hold her son down baffles me. She has not had a job in the 10 years I’ve known her, her youngest kids are now 10 and 12.My boyfriend are servers at a restaurant and are out of work for the foreseeable future. I have enough saved to cover my half of the rent but he does not, not because he is a frivolous spender but because she spends his money to support her household. He shuts down when I ask him about this issue because he feels a lot of guilt about how she suffered raising him. He also feels obligated to care for his younger siblings.Oh and he also makes $200+ a month in car payments for his car, which he bought for himself but which his mom has had at her place 25 minutes away for the past 8 months. She calls it “my car”This is a serious issue with me now and I really want to say something about it but we’re about to be quarantined together so I don’t know. It seems really fucked up and I don’t understand why he lets her take advantage of him to such a huge extenttldr; my boyfriend gives his unemployed single mother whatever she wants, even though it hurts him financially