How do I [25F] stop being so bitter towards my family over something trivial?

tl;dr: How do I [25F] stop being so bitter toward my mother who gave away a free car to my younger brother?

I live with my mother and so do my two adult siblings (31F and 10M). The good part is that I just got a new job so I’ll be moving out but I still need help with getting over the resentment I’ve been harbouring toward my family, particularly my mother.

I was born deaf and because of this my mother is extremely protective of me. I know it’s natural for parents to be more protective when their children have a disability but it’s getting in the way for me. I’m an accountant and got an amazing job at a major institution.

Since I became a teenager I have always wanted to drive a car. I hounded on my mother who by the way is a single parent and she said she enforced a rule that all of my siblings must be 19 before they could give their permit and that the elder sibling gets a car first. I respected that rule.

Until my brother turned 18 and got his permit already. Of course I was mad but let it go since I was focusing on my university studies at the time. Now that my brother and I live under the same roof, my mother got a free car. She happily gave it away to my brother. I got upset because technically by her rules I was supposed to get the car first as I’m older than my brother.

When I confronted her she got quiet and said that she’s giving the car to my brother because he works only 5 mins whereas I commute long distances. I don’t believe this excuse and think that my mother doesn’t want to let me go or accept that deaf people can drive. To be honest it’s quite hurtful and made me resentful of my whole family.

I really need a car to commute to my job even if I move out. No one in my family seems eager to help me out to purchase my first car when I first got my license. They would give me unhelpful responses when I asked for advice.

I want to continue my relationship with my mother but it’s not the same considering how she treated me compared to my siblings.

Submitted March 16, 2020 at 11:51PM

tl;dr: How do I [25F] stop being so bitter toward my mother who gave away a free car to my younger brother?I live with my mother and so do my two adult siblings (31F and 10M). The good part is that I just got a new job so I’ll be moving out but I still need help with getting over the resentment I’ve been harbouring toward my family, particularly my mother.I was born deaf and because of this my mother is extremely protective of me. I know it’s natural for parents to be more protective when their children have a disability but it’s getting in the way for me. I’m an accountant and got an amazing job at a major institution.Since I became a teenager I have always wanted to drive a car. I hounded on my mother who by the way is a single parent and she said she enforced a rule that all of my siblings must be 19 before they could give their permit and that the elder sibling gets a car first. I respected that rule.Until my brother turned 18 and got his permit already. Of course I was mad but let it go since I was focusing on my university studies at the time. Now that my brother and I live under the same roof, my mother got a free car. She happily gave it away to my brother. I got upset because technically by her rules I was supposed to get the car first as I’m older than my brother.When I confronted her she got quiet and said that she’s giving the car to my brother because he works only 5 mins whereas I commute long distances. I don’t believe this excuse and think that my mother doesn’t want to let me go or accept that deaf people can drive. To be honest it’s quite hurtful and made me resentful of my whole family.I really need a car to commute to my job even if I move out. No one in my family seems eager to help me out to purchase my first car when I first got my license. They would give me unhelpful responses when I asked for advice.I want to continue my relationship with my mother but it’s not the same considering how she treated me compared to my siblings.