How to find less selfish hookups as a girl (19F)?

I've been hooking up w a lot of people recently (mostly guys, open to girls but too scared to approach after 3 years of serious relationships w men) and I've found that most guys I hookup with are selfish and horrible in bed. How do I find/vet someone as a decent hookup before I go home with them and have to suffer through bad sex or telling someone I'm not in the mood and leaving?

I go to a big party school, go out 1-2 times a week, and find a lot of hookups on tinder mostly. I exude a lot of confidence (I think) and tend to be really forward and ask guys for their numbers if I think they're cute, but I'm maybe a 6/10 so that might be blocking my success (body isn't super nice rn bc I've gained some weight so I'm at the higher end of a normal BMI but working on it and still dressing to show a classy amount of skin while wearing flattering things). I think I give off a lot of confidence but some guys might see me being forward as desperate? Anyways, I just want to know how I find a hookup who doesn't suck in bed!

Tl;dr, I'm attracting shitty selfish men who don't prioritize my pleasure. How do I get pleasure out of a hookup, whether it be at a party or Tinder?



Submitted February 13, 2020 at 12:29AM

I've been hooking up w a lot of people recently (mostly guys, open to girls but too scared to approach after 3 years of serious relationships w men) and I've found that most guys I hookup with are selfish and horrible in bed. How do I find/vet someone as a decent hookup before I go home with them and have to suffer through bad sex or telling someone I'm not in the mood and leaving?I go to a big party school, go out 1-2 times a week, and find a lot of hookups on tinder mostly. I exude a lot of confidence (I think) and tend to be really forward and ask guys for their numbers if I think they're cute, but I'm maybe a 6/10 so that might be blocking my success (body isn't super nice rn bc I've gained some weight so I'm at the higher end of a normal BMI but working on it and still dressing to show a classy amount of skin while wearing flattering things). I think I give off a lot of confidence but some guys might see me being forward as desperate? Anyways, I just want to know how I find a hookup who doesn't suck in bed!Tl;dr, I'm attracting shitty selfish men who don't prioritize my pleasure. How do I get pleasure out of a hookup, whether it be at a party or Tinder?
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