My (24F) mother (54F) has severe asthma and does nothing to help it

TLDR: mum is a stubborn heavy drinker who sits there whole she has an asthma attack and won't use her inhalers or let me help her.

Right now she's in the next room having an asthma attack with her two inhalers (she has a blue and pink one, they do different things but I don't know what) and not taking them. I went in to make sure she had them and ask what I could do to help, and she just tells me she's fine. That's all she ever says, "I'm fine", if you were fine you wouldn't be struggling to breath? I wouldn't worry so much if she just used her inhalers or asked us to get them instead of laying/sitting there shaking her head and struggling to breath. She also drinks heavily most nights, which definitely doesn't help, as it's when her asthma gets worse.

Before anyone asks, no she won't see a doctor. Last time she did see one was Christmas Eve/Christmas Day 2017, she had an asthma attack and panic attack, became convinced she was having a heart attack, so I called the non-emergency line for advice and they sent an ambulance over. She was mad I'd called them, but the hospital diagnosed her with pneumonia which probably saved her life. I'm pretty sure she's been avoiding seeing a doctor or GP due to her drinking, and she's too fucking stubborn for me to convince. She'd rather argue with me and tell me I need to leave and find somewhere else to live than admit she has a problem (yes, this has happened before).

I don't know how to help her and, honestly, I'm beginning to wonder if she's doing it for attention at least some of the time? She definitely has severe asthma, but her just sitting there struggling to breath for 40+ minutes instead of using her inhalers, which are right next to her, just seems a little sketchy to me?

This is less me asking for advice and more me needing somewhere to rant, but if you have any advice on how I can help her or at least get her to stop sounding like she's dying every single night, I'd appreciate it.

Submitted October 12, 2019 at 11:01PM

TLDR: mum is a stubborn heavy drinker who sits there whole she has an asthma attack and won't use her inhalers or let me help her.Right now she's in the next room having an asthma attack with her two inhalers (she has a blue and pink one, they do different things but I don't know what) and not taking them. I went in to make sure she had them and ask what I could do to help, and she just tells me she's fine. That's all she ever says, "I'm fine", if you were fine you wouldn't be struggling to breath? I wouldn't worry so much if she just used her inhalers or asked us to get them instead of laying/sitting there shaking her head and struggling to breath. She also drinks heavily most nights, which definitely doesn't help, as it's when her asthma gets worse.Before anyone asks, no she won't see a doctor. Last time she did see one was Christmas Eve/Christmas Day 2017, she had an asthma attack and panic attack, became convinced she was having a heart attack, so I called the non-emergency line for advice and they sent an ambulance over. She was mad I'd called them, but the hospital diagnosed her with pneumonia which probably saved her life. I'm pretty sure she's been avoiding seeing a doctor or GP due to her drinking, and she's too fucking stubborn for me to convince. She'd rather argue with me and tell me I need to leave and find somewhere else to live than admit she has a problem (yes, this has happened before).I don't know how to help her and, honestly, I'm beginning to wonder if she's doing it for attention at least some of the time? She definitely has severe asthma, but her just sitting there struggling to breath for 40+ minutes instead of using her inhalers, which are right next to her, just seems a little sketchy to me?This is less me asking for advice and more me needing somewhere to rant, but if you have any advice on how I can help her or at least get her to stop sounding like she's dying every single night, I'd appreciate it.