About to give birth and husband left

I’m not sure what I’m needing/expecting out of this. I feel absolutely lost and broken and I don’t want to talk to my friends or family about it.

I am due to have a baby in 3 days. Obviously I’m already anxious and my hormones are everywhere as it is. Things at home have finally spiraled out of control and I don’t know what I should think about it all.

I made it very clear to my husband that I wasn’t comfortable with him doing activities away from the house in the couple of weeks leading up to my due date. He’s an avid golfer. Well last weekend I gave the OK for him to go sky diving for a buddy’s bachelor party....I wasn’t comfortable with it, but didn’t want to be a “mean wife” so I told him it was fine to go. Made it very clear that I really didn’t want him doing anything else after that on the chance that I could go into labor at any time and I needed to feel like he would be there and available if that happened.

He left two days ago and hasn’t been home since. Back story: he had another buddy invite him to go golf. Even though he knows I said I wanted him home, he still asked if he could go. Again, I felt guilty so I agreed. He said their tee time was at 7:30am, I said ok I’d like you to be home by noon and absolutely NO drinking. A little later in the evening I asked what time he was planning on leaving, he said by 5am. I realize that is waaaay early and ask why...he sort of stumbled on his words and said oh we’re going to get breakfast and hit the driving range first blah blah. At this point I knew something was up. Husband gets into the shower and against my better judgement I go through his phone. He’s busted.

Ya’ll, he was going golfing at a course more than an hour and a half away from home....within days of my due date! I was fuming. When he got out of the shower I casually asked him what course they were going to (there are several in our town) and he lied to my face and said the country club. Didn’t even blink an eye. I LOST IT. I was so pissed that he lied to my face, and even more pissed that he was comfortable going an hour and a half out of town when I’m about to have a baby! I told him if he left to go golf, that I didn’t not want him coming home. I figured he’d be smart and stay home, maybe realize lying was super messed up and apologize? Nope! He got up and left for his golf excursion the next morning and has been gone since. It’s been radio silence.

So I’m about to have a baby, and I’m devastated because my husband to too selfish to be home and act like a family man. He’s too stubborn to admit that he messed up, to apologize for lying, etc etc. He literally doesn’t care that I’m devastated and could go into labor and he’s ok with missing it. He’s ok with not fixing this. He’s ok with being so self absorbed and immature that he’d rather stay elsewhere and leave me alone and pregnant to take care of our daughter alone while I stress about going into labor and being all alone.

Am I overreacting? Or am I justified in feeling like this? I’m so angry, and hurt.

TL;DR My husband is a selfish prick who has decided that golfing and screwing around with his buddies is more important than being a support system for me when I’m about to have a baby in a few days and has been staying elsewhere for two days now, while refusing to apologize for lying to me.

Submitted September 02, 2019 at 12:19AM

I’m not sure what I’m needing/expecting out of this. I feel absolutely lost and broken and I don’t want to talk to my friends or family about it.I am due to have a baby in 3 days. Obviously I’m already anxious and my hormones are everywhere as it is. Things at home have finally spiraled out of control and I don’t know what I should think about it all.I made it very clear to my husband that I wasn’t comfortable with him doing activities away from the house in the couple of weeks leading up to my due date. He’s an avid golfer. Well last weekend I gave the OK for him to go sky diving for a buddy’s bachelor party....I wasn’t comfortable with it, but didn’t want to be a “mean wife” so I told him it was fine to go. Made it very clear that I really didn’t want him doing anything else after that on the chance that I could go into labor at any time and I needed to feel like he would be there and available if that happened.He left two days ago and hasn’t been home since. Back story: he had another buddy invite him to go golf. Even though he knows I said I wanted him home, he still asked if he could go. Again, I felt guilty so I agreed. He said their tee time was at 7:30am, I said ok I’d like you to be home by noon and absolutely NO drinking. A little later in the evening I asked what time he was planning on leaving, he said by 5am. I realize that is waaaay early and ask why...he sort of stumbled on his words and said oh we’re going to get breakfast and hit the driving range first blah blah. At this point I knew something was up. Husband gets into the shower and against my better judgement I go through his phone. He’s busted.Ya’ll, he was going golfing at a course more than an hour and a half away from home....within days of my due date! I was fuming. When he got out of the shower I casually asked him what course they were going to (there are several in our town) and he lied to my face and said the country club. Didn’t even blink an eye. I LOST IT. I was so pissed that he lied to my face, and even more pissed that he was comfortable going an hour and a half out of town when I’m about to have a baby! I told him if he left to go golf, that I didn’t not want him coming home. I figured he’d be smart and stay home, maybe realize lying was super messed up and apologize? Nope! He got up and left for his golf excursion the next morning and has been gone since. It’s been radio silence.So I’m about to have a baby, and I’m devastated because my husband to too selfish to be home and act like a family man. He’s too stubborn to admit that he messed up, to apologize for lying, etc etc. He literally doesn’t care that I’m devastated and could go into labor and he’s ok with missing it. He’s ok with not fixing this. He’s ok with being so self absorbed and immature that he’d rather stay elsewhere and leave me alone and pregnant to take care of our daughter alone while I stress about going into labor and being all alone.Am I overreacting? Or am I justified in feeling like this? I’m so angry, and hurt.TL;DR My husband is a selfish prick who has decided that golfing and screwing around with his buddies is more important than being a support system for me when I’m about to have a baby in a few days and has been staying elsewhere for two days now, while refusing to apologize for lying to me.