I’m (f32) stuck with bf of 6 years (m32) and can’t see a way out

Apologies, it’s a long one! TL:DR at the end. See post history for more context.

I got ill in February and had to leave my job. After getting a little better my SO suggested that now would be a good time to get a puppy, I was at home without full time work and some friends of ours had puppies for sale.

I agreed, since then I have found out the following:

  1. He pays for webcam girls despite there being a problem with our sex life (and before anyone comments, it’s not about me. We’ve discussed this at length, and I am by no means frigid or uncomfortable to do what he likes, nor has my appearance changed drastically) he knows that I consider this cheating. After finding out the first time, and telling him that I consider that too personal and cheating, he did it again.
  2. His gambling addiction has returned and he didn’t tell me, and has repeatedly lied to cover his tracks. He has put us in debt again with this.

He has been caught out lying about all this repeatedly over 6 months, has never told me anything- he was always caught out by accident.

Because I’m not working I have no spare money, we have a puppy and 2 cats which I would have to take with me as I don’t trust him to look after them properly (his work hours are demanding, not because he doesn’t care).

So I have no money and no where to go, family is unfortunately not an option and no friends could house myself and all the pets. The puppy is too young for me to go back to work full time to save money. He doesn’t abuse me physically and despite him being a complete twat, he’s not a bad person so appealing to ‘women’s shelters ‘ is also not an option.

I’m stuck and have to depend on the man who broke my heart to get by financially.

Honestly don’t know what to do.

TL;DR stuck with gambling, cheating bf and have no where to go.



Submitted August 05, 2019 at 11:49PM

Apologies, it’s a long one! TL:DR at the end. See post history for more context.I got ill in February and had to leave my job. After getting a little better my SO suggested that now would be a good time to get a puppy, I was at home without full time work and some friends of ours had puppies for sale.I agreed, since then I have found out the following:He pays for webcam girls despite there being a problem with our sex life (and before anyone comments, it’s not about me. We’ve discussed this at length, and I am by no means frigid or uncomfortable to do what he likes, nor has my appearance changed drastically) he knows that I consider this cheating. After finding out the first time, and telling him that I consider that too personal and cheating, he did it again.His gambling addiction has returned and he didn’t tell me, and has repeatedly lied to cover his tracks. He has put us in debt again with this.He has been caught out lying about all this repeatedly over 6 months, has never told me anything- he was always caught out by accident.Because I’m not working I have no spare money, we have a puppy and 2 cats which I would have to take with me as I don’t trust him to look after them properly (his work hours are demanding, not because he doesn’t care).So I have no money and no where to go, family is unfortunately not an option and no friends could house myself and all the pets. The puppy is too young for me to go back to work full time to save money. He doesn’t abuse me physically and despite him being a complete twat, he’s not a bad person so appealing to ‘women’s shelters ‘ is also not an option.I’m stuck and have to depend on the man who broke my heart to get by financially.Honestly don’t know what to do.TL;DR stuck with gambling, cheating bf and have no where to go.
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