I (M16) am stupid and dont know what to do

Hi,

Sorry if this is gonna be a bit rambely and unstructured im just writing as it comes to mind

​

Im 16 and i have a crush on a girl in my school (btw this is gonna sound like sth straight out of Highschool musical or some shit). We have known each other for the last 1.5 years now and i kind of always liked her but she was just another person i talked to 2-3 times a week. In the last 2 months i have suddenly developed feelings for her and they just kill me. We have become pretty good friends and we even watched alladin along with 2 other people (i know doesn't sound like a lot but hey its a beginning) and watched her dance on local events (shes in a dancing group). We are not best friends by any means but it's still a friendship.

​

So yeah i would love to tell her that i really like her/have a crush on her (this will come up later) but im just a bit worried about it. The (to my knowlede) last guy that was into her was my friend. He even told her that he had a crush on her (tbh it was pretty cringey: on valentines day with a note attached to a rose) but she refused and they didnt talk for a few weeks. It's better now (they talk like nothing ever happened but they are not as close as they used to be). The thing im scared about is that the same scenario would play out if i asked her (Not the rose part, the not talking for weeks and then being neural friends part). This is one of the reasons why im scared about telling her.

​

Another big factor of my fear is that i don't know if she already has a friend or if she has a crush on someone (this must seem like a stupid thing but let me explain). Two Things:

  1. She could already have a friend on social media i couldnt know anything about because i only use whatsapp (which is pretty unlikely because i have never heard her talking about anyone on social media not even to her best friends)
  2. I have got the feeling that she really likes another friend of mine and it seems like he likes her too (I found this out because she and her friend stole his note block and her friend started drawing big "Just Married" signs on the pages which she didn't seem to mind. All 3 of use also signed the paper as a joke but idk if it really was a joke or if she really approves of it (btw heres the Highschool musical esc stuff i was talking about earlier)). In the case that this is the case i also dont want to ruin my friendship with my friend because of me "stealing his crush" or sth like that. I asked him about it but he just laughed it of so im not sure if this is the case or not

​

My last big fear is that i myself dont even know what i want from this relationship. Im don't necessarily want anything sexual out of this (but i wouldnt mind). I think that all i want is to be more that friends with someone. Im many peoples friend but im never anyones best friend and i really would like to be someones "best friend". I also think that i just want someone to hug/cuddle (that isnt my mom) once in a while or just someone i can spend time with. As i said im not sure if i even want to be a boyfriend or just a very good friend.

​

Another thing i cant really decide on is how/when i should tell her. Should i tell her over whatsapp where i would sit by my phone almost dying until she read it. Also if she doesnt awnser and leave me on read i would comepletly die. Or should i tell her in school where people can overhear it.

TL;DR: I really like this girl but idk if 1. her saying no would ruin our friendship 2. she already has a crush/boyfriend 3. what i want from the relationship 4. how to tell her

​

Thanks for reading this jumbled mess and i hope that you guys (and girls) can give me support or even advice



Submitted June 16, 2019 at 12:25AM

Hi,Sorry if this is gonna be a bit rambely and unstructured im just writing as it comes to mind​Im 16 and i have a crush on a girl in my school (btw this is gonna sound like sth straight out of Highschool musical or some shit). We have known each other for the last 1.5 years now and i kind of always liked her but she was just another person i talked to 2-3 times a week. In the last 2 months i have suddenly developed feelings for her and they just kill me. We have become pretty good friends and we even watched alladin along with 2 other people (i know doesn't sound like a lot but hey its a beginning) and watched her dance on local events (shes in a dancing group). We are not best friends by any means but it's still a friendship.​So yeah i would love to tell her that i really like her/have a crush on her (this will come up later) but im just a bit worried about it. The (to my knowlede) last guy that was into her was my friend. He even told her that he had a crush on her (tbh it was pretty cringey: on valentines day with a note attached to a rose) but she refused and they didnt talk for a few weeks. It's better now (they talk like nothing ever happened but they are not as close as they used to be). The thing im scared about is that the same scenario would play out if i asked her (Not the rose part, the not talking for weeks and then being neural friends part). This is one of the reasons why im scared about telling her.​Another big factor of my fear is that i don't know if she already has a friend or if she has a crush on someone (this must seem like a stupid thing but let me explain). Two Things:She could already have a friend on social media i couldnt know anything about because i only use whatsapp (which is pretty unlikely because i have never heard her talking about anyone on social media not even to her best friends)I have got the feeling that she really likes another friend of mine and it seems like he likes her too (I found this out because she and her friend stole his note block and her friend started drawing big "Just Married" signs on the pages which she didn't seem to mind. All 3 of use also signed the paper as a joke but idk if it really was a joke or if she really approves of it (btw heres the Highschool musical esc stuff i was talking about earlier)). In the case that this is the case i also dont want to ruin my friendship with my friend because of me "stealing his crush" or sth like that. I asked him about it but he just laughed it of so im not sure if this is the case or not​My last big fear is that i myself dont even know what i want from this relationship. Im don't necessarily want anything sexual out of this (but i wouldnt mind). I think that all i want is to be more that friends with someone. Im many peoples friend but im never anyones best friend and i really would like to be someones "best friend". I also think that i just want someone to hug/cuddle (that isnt my mom) once in a while or just someone i can spend time with. As i said im not sure if i even want to be a boyfriend or just a very good friend.​Another thing i cant really decide on is how/when i should tell her. Should i tell her over whatsapp where i would sit by my phone almost dying until she read it. Also if she doesnt awnser and leave me on read i would comepletly die. Or should i tell her in school where people can overhear it.TL;DR: I really like this girl but idk if 1. her saying no would ruin our friendship 2. she already has a crush/boyfriend 3. what i want from the relationship 4. how to tell her​Thanks for reading this jumbled mess and i hope that you guys (and girls) can give me support or even advice
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