Friend Asked Me Out, Now I’m Panicking

I (20 F) was recently asked out by a friend (21 F) after spending a day together hanging out platonically. I don’t really feel up to romance at this point in my life as I’m working through a lot of mental health issues, college and the stress that comes with it, emotional/mental abuse from a parent, and trust issues that have gotten worse the past 1-2 years. Because I’m a fool I said yes and am now panicking. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings but I’m worried if I don’t recant now this could get worse than if I just say “sorry, no” now. For further context, we tried to date before and I didn’t feel anything romantic for her, which makes me feel even more guilty now. How should I deal with this appropriately? I want to do the least amount of emotional harm to her as possible, she’s a really great person and friend. I’ve lost a lot of really close friendships in the past few years so I’m desperate to keep those I still have happy and I’m afraid that desire to please is why I said yes so quickly.

TLDR; Friend asked me out, I said yes before thinking it through, now I’m panicking.



Submitted June 16, 2019 at 12:30AM

I (20 F) was recently asked out by a friend (21 F) after spending a day together hanging out platonically. I don’t really feel up to romance at this point in my life as I’m working through a lot of mental health issues, college and the stress that comes with it, emotional/mental abuse from a parent, and trust issues that have gotten worse the past 1-2 years. Because I’m a fool I said yes and am now panicking. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings but I’m worried if I don’t recant now this could get worse than if I just say “sorry, no” now. For further context, we tried to date before and I didn’t feel anything romantic for her, which makes me feel even more guilty now. How should I deal with this appropriately? I want to do the least amount of emotional harm to her as possible, she’s a really great person and friend. I’ve lost a lot of really close friendships in the past few years so I’m desperate to keep those I still have happy and I’m afraid that desire to please is why I said yes so quickly.TLDR; Friend asked me out, I said yes before thinking it through, now I’m panicking.

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