Really like him. Help me be chill!

I (30 F) haven't had the best luck in love. All but one ex-boyfriend cheated on me, and the one that didn't came out as gay and we broke up, so yeah. Kind of unlucky. I also went through a patch the last few years where my normally sky-high sex-drive was completely non-existent. It was a combination of side-effects from birth control, pandemic depression, weight gain and being with a guy who turned out to be gay who I wasn't actually physically attracted to.

About a month ago, I met someone (35 M). We've gone on quite a few dates, slept together a few times, and I'm really starting to like him. I'm very attracted to him, I enjoy his company, and my sex drive is right back to where it was 10 years ago. Because I actually like this guy, I'm in my head about it. My past relationships all moved relatively quickly, and I don't really feel like I have any idea how fast a "normal" relationship is supposed to go. We haven't discussed exclusivity, we see each other 1-2 times a week, text maybe 15 or so times back and forth over the course of a day, and I'm cool with that because it's only been a month.

However, he came over a few days ago and spent the night for the first time and... I've got it, bad. I don't know if it's just post-orgasm haze or my sex drive being present for the first time in nearly 3 years, or what, but I am FEELING THINGS. My pillows still smell like him and I don't hate it. I'm totally in my head. I'm afraid that, if I let him know how much I already like him, I'll scare him off. How do I chill myself out when I'm this excited about someone for the first time in nearly a decade?

*ages are approximate because I feel like he's the type of guy to have Reddit*



Submitted November 08, 2021 at 12:09AM

I (30 F) haven't had the best luck in love. All but one ex-boyfriend cheated on me, and the one that didn't came out as gay and we broke up, so yeah. Kind of unlucky. I also went through a patch the last few years where my normally sky-high sex-drive was completely non-existent. It was a combination of side-effects from birth control, pandemic depression, weight gain and being with a guy who turned out to be gay who I wasn't actually physically attracted to.About a month ago, I met someone (35 M). We've gone on quite a few dates, slept together a few times, and I'm really starting to like him. I'm very attracted to him, I enjoy his company, and my sex drive is right back to where it was 10 years ago. Because I actually like this guy, I'm in my head about it. My past relationships all moved relatively quickly, and I don't really feel like I have any idea how fast a "normal" relationship is supposed to go. We haven't discussed exclusivity, we see each other 1-2 times a week, text maybe 15 or so times back and forth over the course of a day, and I'm cool with that because it's only been a month.However, he came over a few days ago and spent the night for the first time and... I've got it, bad. I don't know if it's just post-orgasm haze or my sex drive being present for the first time in nearly 3 years, or what, but I am FEELING THINGS. My pillows still smell like him and I don't hate it. I'm totally in my head. I'm afraid that, if I let him know how much I already like him, I'll scare him off. How do I chill myself out when I'm this excited about someone for the first time in nearly a decade?*ages are approximate because I feel like he's the type of guy to have Reddit*
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