Getting called names

So last week I (30F) thought I just had allergies, this week my boyfriend (34M) has a sore throat just like I had and he's been sick for a few days. Before he got sick I asked him if we could go on a group bicycling event this Friday and he never really gave me a straight answer. He woke up this morning (thursday)and the first thing I asked was how he was feeling. He said fine and we discussed making plans for today. The only indication he was still sick was he said he couldn't smell still so he wanted to eat something with a lot of flavor.

So since he's able to make plans for today I asked if he still wanted to go on the bike ride thing tomorrow. He proceeded to get frustrated with me because "today is the worst he has felt the whole time." I could tell he was mad I asked if I could make him something for breakfast and he said he wanted hot water which we discussed the night before not to use tap water and to only kettle boil it. He got mad again because I brought him hot water that I didn't cool down at all.

After all of this he called me stupid and incompetent because I obviously don't love him enough or anyone but myself to ask more questions and I shouldn't just assume people are telling me the whole story. I told him "I don't like being called stupid, sure you are smarter than I am but that doesn't make me stupid and I don't deserve to be called that." he proceeded to tell me "if someone I believe is smarter than me is calling me stupid I should probably stop and think why they are saying that."

Basically, I need help determining if I really am heartless or I choose my boyfriend ds poorly.

TLDR: he has been sick for a few days. We woke up, I asked how he was feeling. He said fine. He called me stupid and incompetent for not asking more about how he felt.



Submitted November 12, 2021 at 12:14AM

So last week I (30F) thought I just had allergies, this week my boyfriend (34M) has a sore throat just like I had and he's been sick for a few days. Before he got sick I asked him if we could go on a group bicycling event this Friday and he never really gave me a straight answer. He woke up this morning (thursday)and the first thing I asked was how he was feeling. He said fine and we discussed making plans for today. The only indication he was still sick was he said he couldn't smell still so he wanted to eat something with a lot of flavor.So since he's able to make plans for today I asked if he still wanted to go on the bike ride thing tomorrow. He proceeded to get frustrated with me because "today is the worst he has felt the whole time." I could tell he was mad I asked if I could make him something for breakfast and he said he wanted hot water which we discussed the night before not to use tap water and to only kettle boil it. He got mad again because I brought him hot water that I didn't cool down at all.After all of this he called me stupid and incompetent because I obviously don't love him enough or anyone but myself to ask more questions and I shouldn't just assume people are telling me the whole story. I told him "I don't like being called stupid, sure you are smarter than I am but that doesn't make me stupid and I don't deserve to be called that." he proceeded to tell me "if someone I believe is smarter than me is calling me stupid I should probably stop and think why they are saying that."Basically, I need help determining if I really am heartless or I choose my boyfriend ds poorly.TLDR: he has been sick for a few days. We woke up, I asked how he was feeling. He said fine. He called me stupid and incompetent for not asking more about how he felt.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Add Comments, Posts, Links... etc.

Popular posts from this blog

The difference between being right and being understood

My boyfriend and I are 28. We’ve been together for about 1.5 years and recently moved in together. He’s a pretty patient and easygoing person (Type B) whereas I’m more particular (Type A). Of course there are two sides to every trait, and my Type A nature benefits us in some ways too. Like all couples, we have differences in perspective or preference. When this happens, he will usually say something like “I disagree (with your perspective) but fine.” I tend to push the issue in an attempt to get him to understand where I’m coming from. This escalates the disagreement into a fight because he perceives it as me trying to be “right”. I truly just want to be understood (and I want to understand where he’s coming from) so I’m looking for more of a dialogue whereas he avoids conflict and just wants it to be over as quickly as possible. His general approach is “agree to disagree” but that doesn’t make sense to me when it’s an issue that will keep coming up and requires compromise. I’m n...
Read more

My (27f) gf (27f) is getting tired of me not sharing intimate/ personal info about me

I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love with her, however I can not seem to open up... and I can tell it’s frustrating to her by the way she tells me it bothers her that she feels she’s the only one committed and the one that’s always sharing... At this point I don’t even know if it is that I’ve gotten too used to it, to the point I’ve became lazy to talk about myself or give any genuine personal opinion... it sucks, really, I need to communicate better... Where do I start? Tl;dr: I can’t be completely intimate with my gf and its frustrating her, I need to communicate better because I really love her... where to start? Submitted April 25, 2019 at 06:02AM I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love ...
Read more

My (23M) girlfriend (25F) relationship is confusing to me. I might be the problem, or maybe we are just incompatible.

I met my girlfriend after a few serious breakups that led me to change both intentionally and unintentionally over a few years. For better and for worse. She had just gotten out of an engagement with a verbally and physically abusive man who had a cocaine problem. We have been together about 8 months now. We hit it off and spent a lot of time together but she began to push our relationship as if there were a time clock for milestones. I was pressed beyond my comfort zone and went with it because of my affection for her. My living situation fell apart and I lost a few thousand dollars to shit roommates right around the time she and I met and she offered to let me stay with her. I agreed with some resistance. I pay for food, help her with bills, and throw money toward rent while trying to get back on my feet. As long as we have been together she has gotten more possessive, angry, and irrational. She is dealing with shit from her engagement and I feel shes looking for a level of seriou...
Read more