/u/your-angry-tits on Think my wife is asexual. She engages sexually, always says yes if I ask. She says she doesn't really care about the physical side but likes the closeness. On a blue moon she feels a desire to have sex. Would it be better to wait for her to initiate when she feels it and not ask anymore?

I appreciate your fears about somehow hurting her with the sex in your relationship. I’m ace and married to an allo, and have the same fears that our sexually mismatched relationship will somehow turn into this awful monster that every deadbedrooms or relationshipadvice post about mismatched libidos threatens. I think the fact that you are worried is keeping you aware of your thoughts and negative feelings, or potentially hers, so that you two can address them openly when it comes up. You can use that worry to fuel your awareness of her continued consent before and during sex.

At a certain point, you will have to just trust that she means it when she says she wants to have sex, and that she will tell you the second she’s not into something. It may look unconventional compared to hypersexual relationships all over media and product ads, but as long as it works for you and the person you love, ain’t a thing wrong with it.

September 01, 2021 at 11:25PM