/u/GreaterGoose on I want to start dating but..
Aro here. I have some reasonable amount of experience dating from before I figured it out but I don't pretend exactly understand all the intricacies of relationships. Still, here's my best advice.
My recommendation if you were to use the more common dating websites/apps would be that you be very direct and up front about it. Stand your ground and don't hesitate to block people that don't respect you. You'll have to sift through a lot of people that aren't right for you.
It will involve a pretty large amount of emotional effort, and so only you can decide if that is worth it.
Alternatively, you can ask your friends to try and see if they know anyone that might be willing to go on a date with you, making sure to inform everyone not to expect a sexual relationship. You might feel a bit awkward but most likely your friends will be happy to help. If someone were to ask me, I know I could recommend a decent number of my friends.
Don't be too afraid of rejection. Some people will reject you, you will reject some people, that is very normal and nothing to feel down about! Far better to ask and be told "no" than to languish around in uncertainty.
Lastly, and perhaps most off-topic yet most importantly, remember to enjoy yourself. If you feel stressed and anxious, you're likely going to have a bad time. In the end, a date isn't that big of a deal. A little bit of confidence and just trying to be happy will make it go by much better. You'll probably not get it right the first time, and that is OK.
Just go for it, be yourself, and have fun! You've got this!
September 23, 2021 at 12:49AM
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