Where should I go from here?

I met this girl back in July, and we hit it off really well. She told me she was getting feelings for me and I was too but I told her I needed some time to think on it because of the situation that was happening at the time. I gave it a couple weeks and then finally told her I wanted to make things official, and it went great after that for awhile. We went out, we stayed at eachothers homes and did things together.

Then slowly things started getting more and more distant. Less talking, less seeing eachother, less intimate time. I’ve asked to go on dates and it’s always yes but then we don’t do it. It seems the more I want to be around her the more she pulls away. She’s going through things and I get that but it’s so frequent that it just feels like it’s almost an excuse to not have to commit to the relationship and to have a reason to be distant. She gets mad at me because I second guess everything in the relationship but her actions make me feel like a burden. If I bring it up though she basically just asks me why she would be with me if she didn’t want to be. Which I don’t know why, but it definitely doesn’t feel like she wants to be anymore. It’s made me fearful to even tell her anything. I have brought things up and she broke things off with me for a few days. I thought things might be different when we decided to reconcile and get back together but it’s almost worse.

I just don’t know if I want to end things, currently I see no potential for the future with her. But those first few months were so good. Someone I could see myself being with for a long time, not a temporary fling. She had relayed the same to me, that I was someone she wanted to be with for a long time and could see herself with forever. I wish I could rewind and go back to that.

Should I end it? Should I stick it out and see if it gets better? Should I just leave her alone until she comes to me? I’m at a loss, ive never had to question things like this. It was either something I didn’t want to be in or something I did and made it work. Now I just don’t know what to do.



Submitted March 13, 2020 at 12:11AM

I met this girl back in July, and we hit it off really well. She told me she was getting feelings for me and I was too but I told her I needed some time to think on it because of the situation that was happening at the time. I gave it a couple weeks and then finally told her I wanted to make things official, and it went great after that for awhile. We went out, we stayed at eachothers homes and did things together.Then slowly things started getting more and more distant. Less talking, less seeing eachother, less intimate time. I’ve asked to go on dates and it’s always yes but then we don’t do it. It seems the more I want to be around her the more she pulls away. She’s going through things and I get that but it’s so frequent that it just feels like it’s almost an excuse to not have to commit to the relationship and to have a reason to be distant. She gets mad at me because I second guess everything in the relationship but her actions make me feel like a burden. If I bring it up though she basically just asks me why she would be with me if she didn’t want to be. Which I don’t know why, but it definitely doesn’t feel like she wants to be anymore. It’s made me fearful to even tell her anything. I have brought things up and she broke things off with me for a few days. I thought things might be different when we decided to reconcile and get back together but it’s almost worse.I just don’t know if I want to end things, currently I see no potential for the future with her. But those first few months were so good. Someone I could see myself being with for a long time, not a temporary fling. She had relayed the same to me, that I was someone she wanted to be with for a long time and could see herself with forever. I wish I could rewind and go back to that.Should I end it? Should I stick it out and see if it gets better? Should I just leave her alone until she comes to me? I’m at a loss, ive never had to question things like this. It was either something I didn’t want to be in or something I did and made it work. Now I just don’t know what to do.

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