Men have an obsession with female orgasm, but I can't cum with men and it's ruining relationships for me. Is it that bad if I just fake them?

I posted something similar to the askmen sub already but I've had another frustrating encounter so I feel it's more appropriate here and need to rant

I (female) have never orgasmed from PIV. But I love sex even without orgasm. Having a partner with me if I'm trying to cum ruins the experience. Plus with men they get really cocky/egotistical/proud about it (I used to fake orgasms all the time, so I saw their reactions to it). I don't fake it anymore but this has resulted in more problems than it resolves.

Men get super offended over it. Like, they get all hurt and defensive or just get this disappointed look on their face and go quiet.

I've tried telling partners ahead of time "I don't really cum with people, let's just enjoy sex" and it has the opposite effect, they take it as a challenge and end up disappointed.

Ftr, I've heard all the advice there is on how to do it and it doesn't work. I don't want men fingering me or eating me out or using toys on me. Feel nothing while riding. Don't like masturbating during. All the standard solutions are just non options for me, but I just know that people will inevitably suggest these.

The other issue is that due to health issues, I have abnormally high drive and masturbate a lot, but I don't really like for a partner to be there when I do that, but again, they feel hurt about this so I have to do it when they're not around or asleep and it makes me feel deceptive. 

I know this sub preaches communication and I get that but even though I try communicating they get upset. They don't listen to me. It can't just be an issue with one partner bc this has been every single man I've ever been with and even prospective men who have turned down a relationship when I explain this issue. 

And then, the few men who have been ok with no orgasm don't care about my pleasure at all, which is different.

I also always see these questions answered with "just guide him/teach him what to do! Talk to him and work together and it'll happen :))))" etc but the inherent issue here is that I have zero desire for them to make me cum or to teach them how to, I just want them to accept that it won't happen and get over their male ego bullshit.

I don't understand why men are like this, I get that you want to make a girl cum, but why is it worth getting so mad over if it doesn't happen? Why is her orgasm more important than her being happy? I'm just so frustrated and honestly want to go back to faking it all the time. Is it really that bad to fake it if it helps both parties?



Submitted February 22, 2020 at 11:17PM

I posted something similar to the askmen sub already but I've had another frustrating encounter so I feel it's more appropriate here and need to rantI (female) have never orgasmed from PIV. But I love sex even without orgasm. Having a partner with me if I'm trying to cum ruins the experience. Plus with men they get really cocky/egotistical/proud about it (I used to fake orgasms all the time, so I saw their reactions to it). I don't fake it anymore but this has resulted in more problems than it resolves.Men get super offended over it. Like, they get all hurt and defensive or just get this disappointed look on their face and go quiet.I've tried telling partners ahead of time "I don't really cum with people, let's just enjoy sex" and it has the opposite effect, they take it as a challenge and end up disappointed.Ftr, I've heard all the advice there is on how to do it and it doesn't work. I don't want men fingering me or eating me out or using toys on me. Feel nothing while riding. Don't like masturbating during. All the standard solutions are just non options for me, but I just know that people will inevitably suggest these.The other issue is that due to health issues, I have abnormally high drive and masturbate a lot, but I don't really like for a partner to be there when I do that, but again, they feel hurt about this so I have to do it when they're not around or asleep and it makes me feel deceptive. I know this sub preaches communication and I get that but even though I try communicating they get upset. They don't listen to me. It can't just be an issue with one partner bc this has been every single man I've ever been with and even prospective men who have turned down a relationship when I explain this issue. And then, the few men who have been ok with no orgasm don't care about my pleasure at all, which is different.I also always see these questions answered with "just guide him/teach him what to do! Talk to him and work together and it'll happen :))))" etc but the inherent issue here is that I have zero desire for them to make me cum or to teach them how to, I just want them to accept that it won't happen and get over their male ego bullshit.I don't understand why men are like this, I get that you want to make a girl cum, but why is it worth getting so mad over if it doesn't happen? Why is her orgasm more important than her being happy? I'm just so frustrated and honestly want to go back to faking it all the time. Is it really that bad to fake it if it helps both parties?
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