One Night Stands, Breaking the Cycle and Sunday Night's Planned Hookup

OK, I'm my 30s. Tinder date is younger (not illegally or creepily so). She seems cool, hot--said she finds me "incredibly attractive," which I think is odd over an app. Cause how can you know if you're not in person? She wanted to go to a nearby city and do some crazy (but safe stuff) on Sunday night, stay over in a hotel, and just sex + party. I'm fine with this and have had similarly crazy tinder experiences. I have made it extremely clear that even if we have an incredible time, sex is never an expectation in a situation like that. She didn't seem worried, but I wanted to be clear that I would never assume consent.

She independently texted to double-check the dates on Sunday. Mentioned, she's excited to meet me, very flirty. Drunk texted me Wednesday, letting me know she was excited.

Here's the thing. I've realized this sort of stuff stresses me out. She is not easy to get ahold of via text even though she does usually follow up within 12-24 hours (she mentioned she doesn't like to text, but these require simple responses. Like "no." I am not texting her to chat or something. I can tell she wants to do that in person, not on the phone. However, I have to make reservations for us; I did agree to handle logistics (and I signed up for that eyes open). Yet, I'm not a complete idiot. I will cancel before the cancellation date vs. risking paying for a ghost/no-show.

I texted her tonight to check on Monday's departure times just because whether or not she does, I need to know that stuff. That was 2 hours ago. No response.

Kind of drives home the point that all this is not worth the hassle, but I will go through with this one since it's mainly set up (and candidly, does sound fun. After that, I'm just gonna go on regular dates and just go the GF route. It's time anyway..My thoughts:

  1. Give her 24 hours. Then text or call? Votes? I'm not afraid of calling, but if no pickup, then I have to leave another text on top of that.
  2. If I hear nothing by Friday at midnight, I cancel any reservations so I'm not on the hook for shit. If that happens, I'm not gonna play around with it, we can meet up around here or not.
  3. The reason for my post: I had a bad fall last January. I'm fine, but it was traumatizing and my body went through hell. Totally fine, now. But I've been out of the game and am just second-guessing way more than I once did. Otherwise, I'd just let this play out. But I'm being a baby and want help. I'm not usually this neurotic.
  4. Odds/guesses on whether we'll be on the train together Sunday?


Submitted December 12, 2019 at 12:03AM

OK, I'm my 30s. Tinder date is younger (not illegally or creepily so). She seems cool, hot--said she finds me "incredibly attractive," which I think is odd over an app. Cause how can you know if you're not in person? She wanted to go to a nearby city and do some crazy (but safe stuff) on Sunday night, stay over in a hotel, and just sex + party. I'm fine with this and have had similarly crazy tinder experiences. I have made it extremely clear that even if we have an incredible time, sex is never an expectation in a situation like that. She didn't seem worried, but I wanted to be clear that I would never assume consent.She independently texted to double-check the dates on Sunday. Mentioned, she's excited to meet me, very flirty. Drunk texted me Wednesday, letting me know she was excited.Here's the thing. I've realized this sort of stuff stresses me out. She is not easy to get ahold of via text even though she does usually follow up within 12-24 hours (she mentioned she doesn't like to text, but these require simple responses. Like "no." I am not texting her to chat or something. I can tell she wants to do that in person, not on the phone. However, I have to make reservations for us; I did agree to handle logistics (and I signed up for that eyes open). Yet, I'm not a complete idiot. I will cancel before the cancellation date vs. risking paying for a ghost/no-show.I texted her tonight to check on Monday's departure times just because whether or not she does, I need to know that stuff. That was 2 hours ago. No response.Kind of drives home the point that all this is not worth the hassle, but I will go through with this one since it's mainly set up (and candidly, does sound fun. After that, I'm just gonna go on regular dates and just go the GF route. It's time anyway..My thoughts:Give her 24 hours. Then text or call? Votes? I'm not afraid of calling, but if no pickup, then I have to leave another text on top of that.If I hear nothing by Friday at midnight, I cancel any reservations so I'm not on the hook for shit. If that happens, I'm not gonna play around with it, we can meet up around here or not.The reason for my post: I had a bad fall last January. I'm fine, but it was traumatizing and my body went through hell. Totally fine, now. But I've been out of the game and am just second-guessing way more than I once did. Otherwise, I'd just let this play out. But I'm being a baby and want help. I'm not usually this neurotic.Odds/guesses on whether we'll be on the train together Sunday?
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