I (35f) wanted to ask my coworker (35m) to hangout, but I wasn’t direct enough and now I don’t know how to proceed

There’s a guy at work who is very friendly and helpful, and we’ve been talking a lot lately. I feel like there is always light flirting going on between us.

A few months ago, he told me he was at the beach with his dog and thought of me (because I always ask about the pup) and said “maybe next time you can come with us”. I said that sounded great and to let me know, but he actually never ended up going back because he got busy with work.

I wanted to ask him to hang out (to get to know each other better, not interested in jumping into dating without being good friends first) and figured asking about the dog would be a good way to do it since he previously asked me that way. I was talking about a new riverfront park by my house, and said “you should bring your dog there sometime!” He responded “hmm, maybe. We’ll see” and then we just continued on the conversation normally. It wasn’t awkward or anything.

Now I’m confused. Did he even know I was asking him to hang out, since I didn’t explicitly say “you should bring your dog and meet me there”? Or did he get the hint and said maybe as a way to turn me down (which seems weird since he asked me to hang out before)? How would you take that question—as an invitation to hang out, or just a suggestion for a place to take the dog?

Since we’re coworkers, I’m nervous to ask him to explain because I don’t want to make it weird, and also I don’t want to harass him if indeed he was turning me down!

Tl;dr: A coworker recently asked me to hang out but it didn’t happen because work got really busy. Now that things have calmed down at work, I wanted to take him up on the offer to hang out so I asked, and he said maybe. However, I now realize the way I asked was much too indirect. I’m not sure if he knew what I meant. How do I proceed?

Submitted October 25, 2019 at 11:48PM

There’s a guy at work who is very friendly and helpful, and we’ve been talking a lot lately. I feel like there is always light flirting going on between us.A few months ago, he told me he was at the beach with his dog and thought of me (because I always ask about the pup) and said “maybe next time you can come with us”. I said that sounded great and to let me know, but he actually never ended up going back because he got busy with work.I wanted to ask him to hang out (to get to know each other better, not interested in jumping into dating without being good friends first) and figured asking about the dog would be a good way to do it since he previously asked me that way. I was talking about a new riverfront park by my house, and said “you should bring your dog there sometime!” He responded “hmm, maybe. We’ll see” and then we just continued on the conversation normally. It wasn’t awkward or anything.Now I’m confused. Did he even know I was asking him to hang out, since I didn’t explicitly say “you should bring your dog and meet me there”? Or did he get the hint and said maybe as a way to turn me down (which seems weird since he asked me to hang out before)? How would you take that question—as an invitation to hang out, or just a suggestion for a place to take the dog?Since we’re coworkers, I’m nervous to ask him to explain because I don’t want to make it weird, and also I don’t want to harass him if indeed he was turning me down!Tl;dr: A coworker recently asked me to hang out but it didn’t happen because work got really busy. Now that things have calmed down at work, I wanted to take him up on the offer to hang out so I asked, and he said maybe. However, I now realize the way I asked was much too indirect. I’m not sure if he knew what I meant. How do I proceed?